one last time ↬ deephwi

《 day 5 》

j i n y o u n g —

When dismissal came, I waited for Daehwi at the front gate. He won't talk to me everytime we would bump at each other at the hallways. He would just look at me and walk past by me. He didn't even seat with me during lunch time so I had to seat with Jihoon.

I did enjoy my time being with Jihoon but it felt like something was missing. I didn't feel the same way when I'm with Daehwi. When I saw that he was with Woojin, I would get mad and forget that they are just friends.

I really want to make it up to him today. I shouldn't let my feelings for Jihoon come between us. Daehwi wanted these seven days to be special, but instead, I hurt him. I never wanted this to happen. I don't want him to be hurt, even though, I'm just pretending until this agreement is over.

As I was waiting, I saw Woojin and Daehwi from a distance. Daehwi then ran back inside the school building, I'm guessing he forgot something. Woojin finally spotted me then approached me.

"What are you still doing here?" he asked as he crossed his arms.

"I'm waiting for Daehwi, did he forget something?"

"Yeah, he said he forgot his phone. Why are you even waiting for him? Did you not get the hint that he doesn't want you around him?" he rose his eyebrow and my eyes widened.

"Don't ask why he doesn't want you close to him. Who do you think the reason is that made him look tired today? If you're smart enough, you'll know it's you," he looked at me with a serious expression.

"Look, I know I messed up, so that's why I want to fix things—"

"How? If only you told Daehwi the real reason why you wanted to break up with him, this agreement would never happen, he won't get hurt. You like Jihoon, right? Well, congrats, he likes you too," he told me. I was about to speak when he suddenly talked once again.

"I understand that you don't want to hurt Daehwi but you're confusing. You said that you like Jihoon but you act like you don't. You act sweet towards Daehwi, he sometimes tells me what you message him. Just with that, you made him happy," his voice softened and I felt joy when I heard the last sentence he told me.

"Do you like Jihoon or Daehwi? Or maybe you love them both?" he asked and I jolted in surprise.

"What are you talking about? I only love one person!"

"Jeez, I'm just asking, calm down. Just tell me what you feel when you're around them," my eyes trailed on the ground. My heart started beating faster as my anxiousness started to rise up.

"When I'm with Jihoon, I feel happy too, but it felt different when I was with Daehwi. Everytime our date ends, I still want to be with him. When he cried yesterday, my heart started aching badly. It seemed like I never wanted to break up with him in the first place," I looked at the ground as Woojin starts processing what I just said.

"So, why do you keep on telling that you like Jihoon?"

"I don't know either, to be honest. In the beginning, I never wanted to say yes to the agreement since my feelings for Daehwi started to disappear. He kept on convincing me so I thought of just pretending, but during those times, it seemed like I don't want the days to be over," I sighed heavily.

"Wow, that was a lot to take in. You know, talk to Daehwi about this. Speaking of which, he should be out by now," he then smiled at me.

"I'm glad that my phone was just on my desk, let's go," Daehwi panted and smiled at Woojin. It looks like he didn't care about my presence.

Before they could walk farther away from me, I called out to him. He stopped at his tracks and he turned around to look at me. I told him that I'll walk him home. He turned to Woojin, waiting for his approval. He seemed hesitant at first but he nodded anyway. Daehwi sighed and agreed to do so.

We started walking and it was quiet. This reminded me of the first day I did this to him when we were officially together. It was very awkward, no one would talk.

When we passed by the park, I held onto his wrist and pulled him with me at a bench. We both sat down and looked at sky. It was still quiet until Daehwi spoke up.

"You know, we can end this agreement if you want to," he said, still not looking at me.

"If we do, you don't have to walk me home everytime. We don't have to go on dates anymore. You can have a normal life, without me—" I held onto his hand.

"I don't want to end it. If you want to make it special, leave it to me, I'll make sure you won't regret ever thinking about this agreement. I'll never hurt you again, I promise," I looked through his eyes and I could see tears threatening to fall.

"I don't want you to do something you don't like. If you wanted to break up with me in the first place because you ended up liking someone else, it's fine with me. Just like I told you, I want you to be happy," his tears start to fall from him eyes. I took a handkerchief and wiped them from his cheeks.

"How can I be happy when the person in front me is not? I must admit, I did like someone else in the first place, I just didn't tell you. I kept it all to myself because I don't want to hurt you, instead, it got worst when I said yes to the agreement. I thought I can get through this without hurting you, but I was wrong. So, now, let's continue the agreement. I want to prove to myself that I can make the one I hurt be happy again," I told him. I saw a smile on his lips and his tears started to fall again.

Daehwi started to cry harder and then hugged me tight. He kept on apologizing to me, even though it should be me, so I hugged him back. I rubbed his back to try and calm him down then he did. His sobs got quieter and it seemed like he ended up sleeping.

I didn't bother waking him up and just let him sleep on my shoulder. I smiled to myself and leaned my head on his. I'll bring him home when he wakes up later on. I don't want a moment like this to get ruined, I should cherish this. I should also feel glad that a person like him, who wouldn't give up on the person they love, is still around me.

"i don't deserve you, daehwi, i really don't."

—

《 this chapter seemed like a mess ( ；'Д｀)
but anyways, have you listened to seventeen's comeback yet? it sounds so good and it's titled "thanks (고맙다)"
sorry for promoting them lmao, i love them as much as i love wanna one
more importantly, i hope you enjoyed this chapter ^ ^ 》