The Nightwatchman (English)(From Ashes Vol.2)

Chapter 65 - Stay With Me Tonight

Annie had always compared Guy of Gisborne to the wolf on his coat of arms: he was a proud and ferocious creature, capable of softening in her arms, but always dangerous.
She had never seen that wolf putting aside his pride to ask for forgiveness, never before. And now he was there on his knees beside her bed, apparently humble and repentant.
She thought that she should tell him to leave, that he didn't deserve her forgiveness.
Instead she put a hand in his hair, stroking her fingers through the thick and soft locks, surprised to notice how similar they were to Seth's.
She felt him wince at her touch.
"Guy, if you want to talk to me, look at me."
Gisborne raised his face and the girl sighed to meet that gaze that she had never really forgotten.
"What do you want from me, Guy of Gisborne? Have you come to make sure that I really die?"
"No!" Guy said, and Annie clearly saw the flash of pain that crossed his eyes.
"Why, then? Why after all this time?"
"I have been unfair to you, I wish I could make up for it."
"Can you cure me? Can you make me recover?"
Guy remained silent and Annie sighed.
"Let me die in peace, Guy. Enough with lies."
"They were not all lies, Annie."
"Do you want to make me believe that you loved me?
"No. That wasn't love. I liked to be with you, but then I didn't even know how to love somebody."
"And now you know?"
"Yes."
Annie looked at him for a long time and Guy didn't avoid her gaze even though he was clearly upset. The girl began to think that maybe he was really sincere.
"At least did I mean something for you?"
"You were a bit of warmth, the only one I could have. I took it as if it was my right, but I didn't deserve it at all."
The girl absently moved her hand that was still resting on Guy's hair, in a sort of involuntary caress.
"Maybe Robin is right, you're different. Less arrogant, for sure. What made you swallow your pride, Guy of Gisborne?"
For the first time since he had arrived, on Guy's face appeared that ironic smile that Annie had seen so often in the past.
"Several dozens of lashes, I would say," Guy said, and the girl looked at him, aghast. Surely that wasn't the answer she had expected.
"Really?"
Guy got up from the floor to sit on the edge of the bed, and he took her hand, guiding it under his clothes so that Annie could touch his back.
The girl ran her fingers over Guy's skin, a gesture that was once familiar to her, lingering on the scars.
"You were always so tense in the evening..." Annie whispered. "Then I rubbed your back and I was always amazed, wondering how a man could have such smooth skin..."
"Now it isn't smooth anymore."
Annie followed the contours of the scars with her fingers.
"No it isn't. It must have been very painful."
Guy nodded.
"I almost died. But you know something, Annie? I don't regret it. It made me open my eyes on many things."
"Touching death makes this effect. I am discovering it now."
Guy looked at her, deeply disturbed.
"Annie..."
The girl smiled sadly.
"Is that a tear? Really Guy of Gisborne is able to cry? For me?"
Gisborne sat on the bed, leaning on the headboard with his back, and took her in his arms with a sigh.
Annie crouched on his chest, resting her head tiredly on his shoulder.
"I used to like to be in your arms, once. Do you remember? I liked looking at the stars that we could see from the window of your bedroom."
Guy nodded, smiling between tears.
"Yes, I remember. I wasn't capable of love, I didn't allow myself to love, but the time I spent with you was important, and this is not a lie."
"Really, Guy?"
"You gave me warmth, for a few hours you were a refuge from the cold of my world. When I was with you I could relax, stop being on guard, at least for a while."
Annie still had her hand on his back and the warmth of Guy's skin warmed her cold fingers, but she could also feel how stiff his muscles were.
"Even now you are tense, but I no longer have the strength to rub your back..." Annie stopped with a sob. "I'm scared, Guy!"
Gisborne held her tight and brushed her hair with a gentle kiss.
"For this time let me be your refuge. Trust me with your fear and we will face it together. I want to protect you, Annie, for all the times I didn't do it."
She felt him tremble and she realized that he was afraid too, that he was really sorry for her.
"I tried to forget you, I told myself that I hated you, that you didn't deserve the love I gave you."
"It was true. I didn't deserve it."
"Yes. But I've never really been able to forget you. Even if I wanted, I couldn't. Seth looks like you so much... Day after day, every time I looked at him, I felt like I was seeing you. And like a fool, a part of me persisted in hoping you'd be back."
"I'm here now."
"Just because I'm dying," Annie said, looking at Guy, and she caught the exact moment when something in the knight's expression seemed to crumble.
"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" Guy sobbed and even Annie burst into tears.
"Come here, hug me!" She begged him in a whisper, and Gisborne held her close.
They wept together, hugging, and Annie found herself stroking Guy's hair to console him.
"Forgive me," Guy said, unable to stop crying. "I should be the one to give you courage. Sorry."
The girl wanted to have the strength to hold him tight, but she could barely touch his face with her fingers.
"I don't mind seeing this weaker side of Guy from Gisborne, you know? You are crying for me. Nobody has ever done it, you're the first, and probably the last one who will ever do it..."
They remained close, in silence, trying to calm down. Annie felt weaker and struggled to breathe well, but she didn't want Guy to notice.
"Tell me something," she whispered. "Tell me what you did all this time."
Gisborne understood that Annie didn't want to think of her approaching death, that this was the only thing he could do for her: talk to her to keep her thoughts away from the end that was so evident on her face.
He nestled her better in his arms so that she was comfortable, her head resting on his heart, and he smiled, wiping his tears with one hand.
"It's a long story."
Annie forced herself to lift a hand to touch his cheek with a finger.
"I have nothing else to do."