Two Times Better

Finally standing up for myself

Aaron and I picked the only empty table there was and to my luck, I was right across from Taylor and her little group of snobs. As we sat at the table, I looked over my shoulder and caught them whispering while staring at me. I just looked away. I suddenly saw Aaron look behind me and knew exactly why. I could feel Taylor's prescience, the one who made me try to kill myself, behind me. It sent a chill up my spine.

"Um, excuse me? Do you think you could like move farther away from us?," Taylor said as she tapped on my shoulder, "we don't want any of your suicidalness to wear off on us. Thanks!" I could feel tears sting my eyes but I didn't let them show. Aaron took my hand and was about to say something before I stopped him.

"No, Aaron, let me handle this,"I said as I stood up and faced Taylor, "No, Taylor, I will not move. Let me tell you that I am no longer suicidal. Want to know the reason I was suicidal? Okay, I'll confess to all of you," I stepped onto the table to make sure everybody could see me and hear me clear, "as most of you probably know, I am Ana Smith and yes, I tried to kill myself. I had my reasons. Want to know them? Well, my father died a few years ago and I lived with my mother who had changed after all of it. We just started to not get along at all. Not too long ago she became an alcoholic and started to brutally beat me. For no reason at all, sober or drunk, she beat me. She said I was a mistake and that I was ungrateful. She called me these awful words. It made me feel useless and unwanted so I started to cut myself. Physical pain seemed to make emotional pain go away. After that, I found Aaron. He made me go to the hospital and confess what my mother had done. She got put in jail and I started to live with Aaron. Right when I thought everything was going fine, a few people just decided to make matters worse. They bullied me by calling me nasty names and telling me how fat and ugly I was. I cried that entire day. Then a couple weeks later, they did the same thing but worse. They told me we would be better off without me and I should just go kill myself. So that's what I tried to do. One of those girls was you, Taylor," I said as I stepped off the table facing her, "You and Adele and Lindsay. You were the cause of me trying to kill myself. I'm not mean but I am honest and I am going to be completely honest with you right now. You three are the nastiest girls I have ever had to deal with. You are extremely rude and all you care about is yourselves. You make people feel awful about themselves. You almost made me lose my life. How would you feel the rest of your life knowing that you made a girl kill herself? How could you live with that? Nobody deserves to feel the way I did because of you or any other bully in this school or anywhere else. You are ALL beautiful no matter what. Nobody need to lose their lives over what somebody said. You have great lives ahead of you, all of you. Stay strong because you are all worth it." I did it. I finally did it, I stood up for myself. As I sat down, everybody stood up and gave me a roaring applause. I was overjoyed knowing that I had just made a difference in people lives. Even the teachers were applauding for me. Taylor, Adele, and Lindsay all looked ashamed and guilty. That's just what they needed but they also needed a pep talk. I decided to be the one to give it to them.

"I'm sure that all three if you are very well capable of being amazing people. You are all gorgeous you just have to learn to embrace it from the inside. We all make mistakes and learn from them. That is what I hope you three do." I told them. That made me get even louder applauding and even some whistles. I couldn't stop smiling but I think there was one other person who had a smile bigger than mine. That person was the one I call my boyfriend. Aaron was smiling from ear to ear and was clapping the loudest before he came over to me and gave me the biggest hug ever. The best hug ever.

"I am so proud if you, babe. So so proud." Aaron whispered in my ear. "I love you so much and I knew you could do it all along." He faced me.

"I love you, too. You were the one giving me hope through everything." I told him.

"And now, your the one giving me hope." That made me smile even more and one tear of joy rolled down my face. He cupped my face as he did the first time we kissed and gave me the most passionate kiss we have ever had. Fireworks. All I saw were fireworks. I am proud of myself for the first time. I did it and I'm so proud.