Mars Attacks!: One-Shots and Rants

So close and yet so far

She stood in the door way of the room that had become all too familiar to her, she felt like she could trace the light from the window as it framed his face in warm light. Her feet moved slowly across the pale floor that she had grow to hate, it reminded her of his eyes, the ones she hadn't looked into in years. Wait, what colour were they again? She had come to realize that she was forgetting things, no, letting go of things, things she didn't know she was ready to let go of.

"Hey there," she whispered, it was hardly audible above the sorrow in her throat. She wiped away a tear from her left eye, sometimes she felt like she couldn't cry, but it always came back to her, most of time it was in this room, or in her own, when she was alone with just her thoughts.

Jemma Simmons walked over to chair next to the bed that sat in the center, it was cold when she sat down, the room was always cold, her hand reached instinctively over to his and held it tight. She forced a weak smile on to her face even though she knew that he couldn't see it. "I-" her voice broke on her first word. "I finished the Oblivion project, you remember that, we started it in school. Your idea, of course," she felt a burning feeling in her chest, it breathed inside of her, like a monster priming for a fight, but a fight for what, she had lost the fight already.

"It's been so-"

Gaaasp, wheeeeze.

She hesitated and listened to his breath for a moment. It had gotten deeper for moment or two, but now was slow, even, normal, as it always was over the past years.

"Leo," she breathed his name "it's been a year and I just wanted to come talk to you, again, but this is different. I know you would understand, I mean, you always have," she sighed, letting the silence settle around them for a moment.

It was almost a comfort some nights, she would come in here after everyone went to sleep, she would somehow end up in this small room off the farthest wing in the building. Leo was asleep and she was awake. In ways it was like how they used to be back in school. Two in the morning, he would have been up since six that morning and be asleep by the time she came back to the room, while she stayed up, working on whatever project they had planned for a class or something.

But those days were over, his days... were over.

"Their going to pull life support!" she let the words - that she dreaded for so long - fall from her mouth and ride with the tears down her face. "I'm sorry, Leo. Oh, gosh," she squeezed his hands tighter with both of hers and let the warm tears cascade down her pale face. Her shoulders were shaking and her eyes were drying out.

She remembered when they told it was coming up on the one year mark. About three days ago, oh, she could remember everything in that moment, Coulson's eyes were tired looking and slightly red-rimmed, his voice was weak when he told her, breaking. The doctors at the back of the room were still, almost frozen and the whole room seemed to lose air. Tears rode down her eyelashes, dripping almost in a pattern due to her silent sobs.

"...we don't have the money...a year...no responses...I can't do anymore...you need to move on now, forget this..." somehow she only remember parts of what he had told her, that parts she hated the most. They burned into her mind as if she had heard them a hundred times over.

S.H.I.E.L.D... The place that she, no, they had counted on for so many year was now the one pulling the plug on them. She knew that as soon as he was gone, most of her would be too, they had practically grown up next to one another, the acadmy was the best years of her life and the ones she would remember on her bad days, on her worst days.

She shook her head, she hated the sound of her crying, she felt like she was the only person making noise in the world, like she was dropped in a lake of silence and everyone could hear her. Every sound that came from her mouth was a violation. She cupped her hands around her mouth as gentle sobs kept her her eyes shut tight.

"Ms. Simmons," the red headed nurse spoke, starling Jemma, who could tell by her face that she was sick of people like her, people who wouldn't let go.

The woman took gentle steps forwards, her eyes watching her patients visitor carefully, "the doctors are ready when you are," her words sounded forced, with regret coating them.

Jemma looked back at the nurse, she was going to say 'thank you' but couldn't really see a reason for it now, so she gave the women a quick nod and slowly stood to her feet, her thin hands were quaking.

Why did this have to be it, the end? it wasn't right, then again she couldn't pick how she goes, that just wasn't something she could do, but did it have to be like this?

(Bit of a random thing that I started like a week after AOS ended, but now that it is coming back, I thought I would finish it, the ending is lame, but I sorta rushed it.)