The Big Book Of Sempai / Senpai

How To #17 - Start A Conversation With Senpai

How to Start a Conversation With Your Senpai
Your crush is there, sitting just across from you. So close and yet so far! Just how do you start a conversation with someone you barely know or have such strong feelings for? It's not as hard as it sounds. Get started with Step 1 below to be on your way to kisses and hand-holding!

Part One of Three:
Preparing Yourself

1
Learn your crush's interests and hobbies. Pay attention to what your crush does for fun. People generally enjoy talking about things that they know and like. Look for common ground between you two for topics to discuss.
For example, find out what their extra curriculars are or what they do on the weekends. You can ask their friends or just pay attention to what they say they're doing.

2
Get a feel for your crush's personality. Are they shy? Maybe they are very social and extroverted? Taking cues from his or her social interactions will give you an idea of how to eventually approach your crush.
For example, if they're shy, talking to them around other people or being very open with your affection may scare them, and this should be avoided.

3
Get a rough idea of your crush's schedule. You can only have a conversation if you are both in the same place at the same time. This information will increase the likelihood that you will have an impromptu "run-in" with your crush!
If simply paying attention doesn't help, you can always recruit one of their friends to help you out. Good friends will want to help their friend get a boyfriend or girlfriend. Just make sure they're trustworthy.

4
Look good to feel good. You want to look you best, to show your crush that you think they're worth the effort. Feeling comfortable with your outward appearance will also give you an extra boost of confidence! Take special care with:
Hair - Get a fresh haircut or style your hair in a nice way. Don't go for a totally new hairstyle though...it will look out of place!
Clothes - Wear an outfit that your crush might like. Above all, make sure your clothes are clean, fit your body, and are free of wrinkles or stains.
Grooming - Washing, shaving, and smelling pleasant will go a long way! Check out information on grooming here.

Part Two of Three:
Having a Conversation

1
Pick the time and place. Depending on what you learned about your crush, choosing the when and the where of your conversation could be very important. If you want to have an intimate one-on-one conversation, start the conversation when your crush is alone. If you are in a group or in a loud location, the conversation can be more casual.

2
Start the conversation with confidence. Speak clearly and make eye contact with your crush. Your body language says much about your interest. A smile wouldn't hurt, either!
Remember that they are just another person, just like you. You don't have to be nervous, and even if things don't go exactly as you plan, everything will still be okay in the end.

3
Use open questions. These are questions that can't be answered with a simple yes or no. The goal is to get them talking and keep them talking, because this will give you the most opportunities to have something to respond to, creating a real conversation!
Open questions usually start with "why" or "how", or deal with complex subject matters. For example, you could ask: "What was it like growing up in New York and then having to move here?", "Why did you want to take this class?", or "How are you liking working with _____?"

4
Listen actively and pay attention to your crush's body language. Try asking follow-up questions on topics that your crush seemed genuinely interested in. Tone of voice and body language can give you an idea of how the conversation is going.
If they seem very disinterested or distracted, quit while you're ahead. You don't want to give them the impression that you're super awkward. Just excuse yourself ("Sorry, I forgot I was supposed to call my Aunt for her birthday!") and try again another time.