Welcome to California

Thirteen

Blake's POV

Saturday 1AM

I lay on his chest. His heart beats quickly but his breaths goes slow.  I'm pretty sure he's sleeping, so I stand up and walk to my bathroom.

I look into the mirror and turn on the water. I look like total shit, my hair is messy and my skin is oily and gross. Add to that I haven't showerd for four days, so all in all I'm feeling pretty fucking gross.

After I washed my face I jump into the shower and let myself in a bath. I light my vanilla candles and turn off the light.

The hot water covers my whole body, my skin is already red but despite that I have goosebumps all over my body and am freezing. I close my eyes and try to remember what happend by the accident.

I haven't told anyone yet but I can remember a few things again like my adress or Mike, who huged me earlier.

Grayson didn't lie when he told me that our sex was anazing! But I can't remember being with Grayson, I know I should but I just don't. I thought if I sleep with him I would, but there was nothing.

No memory, but a lot of feeling! - Naybe the feeling is the memory...

I turn off the water and step out of the shower. I quickly put my hair up in a bun and dry my body befor I walk out of the bathroom to my closet. I put on my black calvins and throw on a oversized t-shirt.

***

Saturday 4AM

After a while of trying to fall asleep, I shake Graysons shoulder. "What...?" He grumbles and I give him a kiss on the cheek. "Hey, I can't sleep." I whisper and he turns around pulling me closer. "Wanna talk?" He whispers and I nod. "Tell me bout your past. I mean when we weren't together."

Grayson's POV

Saturday 4AM

"Tell me bout your past. I mean when we weren't together." She says and I feel how my body is getting cold. Goosebumps form over my whole body, only of the thought of what happened . I hope she doesn't notice that I'm shaking.

Nobody exept for my parents and siblings know about what happend and I really wasn't planning on telling anyone but I figure she is so sleepy she would forget it anyway so I start telling her about her.

"So me and Grayson grew up in New Jersey, actually nothing ever really happend to us until we moved to California. We wanted to become actors, but I got a schoolership for UCLA so I started studying filming. And there was this girl in my class, her name was Rachel. She was the most beautiful girl I've ever seen so I walked up to her and told her straight to the face. I fell in love with her the second she turned her head around and we quickly became friends. After a while we became a couple. We were inseparable and spent every second together. We would do everything together. I even ditched Ethan and shared a room with her. But he wasn't mad he was the only one who wasn't annoyed about me being with her. My sister thought I spent to much time with her and so did my parents but E, he always had my back. Anyways we were inseparable." I chock on the words that I'm about to say but I keep on talking it feels good telling someone. "And than she... she got pregnant, everyone told us that we shouldn't have the child that we were to young and that we couldn't raise a child on our own that we were kids ourselves and even though we knew that they were right, we didn't listen. I loved her so much..." My voice breaks and Blake turns around. "It's okay you don't have to tell me." I shake my head. I wanna tell her, I want her to know even if she forgets all of it. It doesn't matter I just wanna get this shit of my chest!!! "It was May... the 26th. He was so small and beautiful. His eyes were a clear blue like Rachels and his hair was a dark brown..." Tears roll down my chest, but I wipe them away and Blake pulls me closer. "I'm here, Gray, I'm here." - "He looked like an angel. He was and still is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. We were so proud, me and Rachel and happy. We... we went to Canada to vist her family with Noah. That was his name. And me and her brother we...we went snowboarding and..." I start crying and this time I can't stop. The tears just run over my cheeks and there's nothing I can do about it. "Rachel and Noah stayed home and... and" my voice breaks and I start crying even more. I try to stop it but it doesn't work. Blake strocks over my head planting kisses on my forehead and whispeing that it is okay and I don't have to keep talking. "she...she killed herself and she...she took him with her. She had depression and...and" - "Grayson stop talking."

Blake's POV

Saturday 5AM

"Grayson stop talking." I don't know what else I can say. He's laying on my chest and is still crying. A lot of people think it's weak when guys cry but I know that it's not. It only shows that you're strong enough to show emotion.

I want to calm him down and help him but he's crying so much that I don't know how. The words that just came out of that mans mouth are so surreal and strange. I have have no clue how he feels and what I should say to calm him down.

So instead of saying something I pull him closer and put my lips onto his. I start kissing him softly and playing with his hair. I turn him around making him lay on his back and climb ontop of him. "It's alright Grayson." I whisper and he shakes his head. "It's my fau..." -  "It's not your fault baby. Try to sleep." I know that this won't help but I don't know what else to do. I put my head on his chest and close my eyes.

After a while he falls asleep. Even tho his breathing is still fast it gets more and more consistent.

He's a father...
Well he was once...

Authors Note:

I hope you guys like this chapter. Btw, I cried while writing this!!!😂😭 Gosh I always get that emotional while writing😢

And in honor of the day I actually wrote this on: HAPPY BIRTHDAY 🎂💖🎈💖🎊💖🎉 to ETHAN & GRAYSON DOLAN I LOVE YOU GUYS WOTH ALL MY HEART AND YOU MAKE ME SOOO SOOOO HAPPY!!!!!!💜💖💜💖💜💖 (I know they won't see this!)