Tough love

Chapter 19-Friends?

Dear diary
Today was okay but not a good as yesterday. Today I felt all sorts of emotions and, questioned myself. Especially on Ace liking Veronica. I feel like he likes her because whenever he is in his assigned seating groups he smiles and laughs with them. They even signed each other's desks and that never happened when Ace was in my group. I guess I get really jealous when that happens sometimes it makes me doubt that there is even a possibility of Ace liking me. Today I also questioned my friends. Sometimes Veronica and Winny ignore me. Especially when we were working on our project. I felt like a total outsider today. Bad days usually happen when Realynn's not around. I missed Ace and Realynn today. There is also a reason on why I don't like to play sports or dance. It's because I am embarrassed on if I do something bad then people will yell at me or make fun of me. I know people say that I have friends. I'm just not sure anymore I am just glad I have a great mom and dad and family who love me and I would not replace the with anyone else. Sometimes I don't want to talk to anyone cause I think I might say something mean or hurtful. I have also wanted to Skype my dad but I never get the time to cause of how much homework I get now. Plus that my brother Kevin just wants to watch Logan and jake Paul all the time I do not know who they are though. When I walk into school on Monday my only wish. Is to not be an outsider anymore. To be able to talk and play freely. That is my only wish for Monday or for Monday to at least be an amazing day. I also want to say one more thing. Even if your not my friend or you're mad at me or I'm mad at you. If something ever happens to my fellow class mates I hope they will tell me what happened and I will help them solve there problem. Because I might not show or say it my classmates mean a lot to me so do my family and friends.
-Astra