[DISCONTINUED] My Whole Family Thinks I'm Straight (Lams)

6

John awoke the next morning in a not so pleasant way: by falling from the sofa and onto the hard floor, then proceeding to hit his head on one of the wooden coffee table legs. Even more lucky for him, as he tried to stand up he hit his head again pretty hard on the glass surface of the table.

"Motherfucker!" He whisper-shouted, letting his head drop back to the floor.

From the minimal light that streamed through the gaps in the curtains, he gauged that it was still pretty early, though he wasn't sure exactly what time.

"John it's 6:32am, why the fuck are you making noise?!" Alex screeched like a madman as he burst into the main living area of his apartment. At least he answered John's question.

"I fell off of this fucking sofa and hit my head on the table, twice!" John groaned from the headache the talking had given him. He scooted away from the wretched table and pushed himself up to his feet, muttering profanities as he felt liquid drip down his forehead. Whilst he was briefly confused, he quickly realised it was blood from hitting it twice.

"Bastard table." He mumbled, wiping his forehead on his sweater sleeve. Alex watched worriedly from the side, wondering whether he should interject or not. Before he'd even had an opportunity to John was already walking towards Alex's room. "I'm taking a shower."

"Sure, just don't have it on full blast, that's what Maria does when she's round here and it's super annoying when I try to sleep." Alex told him, rubbing his tired eyes as he slumped behind John.

John stopped in his tracks and turned to face Alex, his face displaying a look of pure confusion. "Yeah, I'll keep it low, but who's Maria? I've never heard you mention her before."

Alex raised an eyebrow and stood thinking. "Have I really never told you about her?" John shook his head. "Oh, well she's just my girlfriend. Do you need a towel by the way?"

John wafted his hands around as though he was getting rid of other thoughts than Maria. "Sure, but how did I never know about your girlfriend? We've known each other for a few months now and you've even met Martha, how come you..." He paused, trying to make sense of this.

Alex just lazily shrugged. "Never came up in conversation."

John stood looking bewildered as he watched Alex shuffle back into his bedroom and climb back into his Spongebob bedsheets that he 'bought ironically, so shut the fuck up, John.'

Despite still being utterly confused, John walked to Alex's room, grabbing his duffle bag on the way. "So where did you say the towels were?" He asked, looking over to Alex who was lying with his head buried in his pillow.

"I didn't say," Alex said into his pillow before turning to face John. "But they're on the floor of my closet."

John opened the door to the closet and immediately spotted the towels. 'Ah yes, here they are, right next to my sexuality.' He thought in an attempt to humour himself before grabbing one and going to the bathroom.

Lazily, he slung his bag into the corner of the room and threw his towel down next to it. Alex didn't have a separate shower and bath so when it came to turning on the water so that it could warm up, John managed to get his entire front soaked by the water and consequently nearly slipped over and broke his neck trying to get out of the bath.

His head still throbbed from injuring it on the table, and with all of the thoughts of Maria swimming around his mind, it didn't help the cause.

As he waited for the water to heat up he looked at his forehead in the mirror, his nose crinkling at the sight of the wound, although it probably wouldn't scar too much, if at all.