Hush

Chapter 10

*Andy’s P.O.V.*

Crossing my legs, I sat myself down on the grassy ground of the park and began to search through my bag before pulling out a little notebook and pencil. Opening it, I turned a few pages and began to scrawl in lyrics; “you always want the one that you can’t have, cause love isn’t always fair.” Writing was how I managed to cope with how I felt most of the time, just getting the words out like this helped take a huge weight off my shoulders. This particular song I’d been writing about Juliet. I knew now that I desperately liked her, maybe even as far as loved her. I wasn’t sure on that bit, but I did know that she meant the world to me. However, I also knew that I could never tell her that, I didn’t want to lose her, not like I’d lost everyone else. So, instead I just told my notebook how I felt. I poured my emotions out onto the crisp paper, trapping them within its margins, safely hidden from the rest of the world.

Glancing up, I noticed Chance strolling across the park towards me, his back to the dusky evening sky. I sighed; I wasn’t counting on him turning up here. I guess I’d have to save my writing for later. Pushing the notebook and pencil back in my bag, I prepared myself for the onslaught of questions that was probably about to follow. He seemed rather caught up on the whole subject of Juliet since he’d came here and I’d confessed to him that I liked her, and I presumed that today would be no different.

“Hey buddy, what’cha doing?” he asked cheerily, finally reaching my spot and settling down opposite me.

“Nothing,” I replied back with a shrug, “just getting some fresh air.” He smiled, throwing his bag on the ground

next to him and straightening his shirt.

“So, how are you and Juliet?” he queried, shooting me a questioning look. Great, here come the questions. That’s just what I need right now.

“We’re good thank you,” I replied truthfully. He simply rolled his eyes and shook his head at me and I shot him back a quizzical look.

He frowned at me. “Have you seriously still not asked her out yet?” I sighed and looked down at my hands. Of course I hadn’t, I couldn’t do that.

“No,” I whispered, half ashamed at myself, wishing that Chance would just stop with the questions, but knowing him, he wouldn’t until he got his way.

“For heaven’s sake Andy, are you actually ever going to ask the girl out?” he exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. “You really, really like her don’t you? Or is she just not good enough for your high expectations?”

“No, no. She’s perfect. She’s funny, interesting, intelligent, not to mention beautiful,” I told him.

“Then what’s the issue?” Chance cried, clearly exasperated. I sighed, ruffling the back of my hair. I might as well tell him, he was my best friend after all, he’d understand. I hope.

“Because I don’t think she likes me, and I don’t deserve someone like her. I don’t want to burden her with the train wreck that is me. She deserves so much more than that,” I whispered, sadness slipping into my voice as I stared down at my feet. I heard shuffling as Chance moved closer, wrapping his arm around my back.

“First of all, she does like you, that’s pretty clear to see. Second, I understand what you’re saying, but you can’t let your past hold you back, dude. I know you’ve been through a lot of shit, an awful lot of shit that’s not fair, but you’ve got to move on. I think Juliet would be a great idea, you two suit well. She’s lovely, and she seems like the sort of person who could help you out with, you know, all your issues.”

Glancing up at Chance, I shot him a week smile. “Do you really think so?”

“Yeah, I really think so,” he replied, a smile on his face. “You’ve just gotta find the courage to ask her.”

“I guess, thanks Chance,” I replied, a small flicker of hope rising in my chest.

“No worries, dude,” he sighed, before glancing up and whispering to me; “speak of the devil, I gotta run.”

Smirking, I glanced up for the second time to see none other than Juliet strolling across the park. I felt my stomach flip over at the sight of her. She was beautiful as always, her light hair pulled up in a ponytail, and her beautiful green eyes fixated on her phone screen as she walked.

“I’ll see you later,” Chance whispered quickly, before dashing off away towards the parking lot. I rolled my eyes at him and said a quick goodbye. What was the boy up to? I knew he thought that I should ask Juliet out, but just leaving us in a park together wouldn’t make that any more likely to happen.

Pulling myself to my feet, I decided to go say hello. As I approached, I noticed her headphones were in, so she wouldn’t be able to hear me. I guess I’d just have to surprise her then. Speed walking over, I crossed her path and waved at her. She laughed and tugged out her headphones. I swear that smile is what keeps me going, it’s gorgeous.

“Andy!” she cried, running over and jumping on me.

“Hey. Oh shit!” I cried as I lost my balance and fell backwards onto the grass, accidentally taking Juliet down with me. That hurt. Opening my eyes, all I could see was the dusky orange sky overhead. Tilting my head so I could look down, I saw Juliet’s small frame draped over mine, her head resting on my chest. I felt myself blush at the sight, it was so perfect. Suddenly, a wave of concern hit me. What if she’d hurt herself?

“Are you okay?” I asked quickly, stroking her arm with my hand. She lifted her head up and smiled down at me, before bursting out laughing.

“I’m completely fine,” she giggled, “but you should’ve seen the look on your face as you fell.” I smirked at her. I’m glad she was okay. Once she stopped laughing, she shuffled about slightly to get comfier, seeing as neither of us wanted to get up yet. This was surprisingly comfy. Closing my eyes, I stroked her back, enjoying the comfortable silence between us. We stayed like that for what seemed like forever, but in reality it was no more than fifteen minutes.

I felt Juliet moving and opened my eyes again to find her face inches away from my own. She smiled nervously at me and I felt my face go bright red. I noticed how her eyes kept dancing from mine to my lips and back again, causing a million nerves to erupt in my stomach. Was this actually happening? But she didn’t like me, right? I was pretty sure that she didn’t, but Chance had said he thought she did, so maybe..

My thoughts were temporarily cut short by Juliet as she leant down and pressed her warm lips against my own. I swear my heart did an involuntarily backflip. I know that’s cheesy as hell, but I swear that it is exactly what it felt like. This could not be happening, could it? My body was frozen in shock, but my mind continued to race at a hundred miles an hour, asking every possible question about the situation. Did she actually like me then? Was I just dreaming? Had Chance put her up to this? Did she feel the same way I did?

Slowly, she pulled away and stared down at me, a face full of nerves and anticipation. I didn’t know what to do with myself; I didn’t know what to say. I opened my mouth to speak, but then thought better of it and shut it again. I would probably only say something stupid anyway.

I watched as she turned a ghostly white, fear tainting her face. Her eyes filled with sudden tears as her face contorted with hurt and sadness. “I should’ve known, I shouldn’t have done that, I’m so sorry,” she rambled. She scurried to her feet and hastily legged it across the park, clearly eager to get as far away as she possibly could. I sat up, my head fuzzy with questions. Then suddenly it hit me. She had just kissed me. Juliet had actually kissed me, and I’d been so stupid as to not do anything about it. She probably thought I hated her right now, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Fuck! I pulled at my hair and inwardly screamed at myself. Why didn’t I just kiss her back? That’s the moment I’ve been longing for and I’ve just thrown it away.

I’d have to go after her. I couldn’t leave her like that, she was fragile enough as it was, she didn’t deserve to be treated like this. She needed to know I was hopelessly and endlessly falling for her. She needed to know now. Getting to my feet, I grabbed my bag and sped in the direction she’d headed, hoping and wishing that my long legs would get me to her in time.