Guarding My Heart

Cinco : Solo en casa

Punto de vista de Lea

That night, I ran back home as fast as I could. I didn't want to face anyone anymore. I was terrified of being recorded. Especially by someone who I barely know but are friends together with Liam. I know better than to trust Liam's friends after that incident five years ago. I didn't want anyone to know about that incident that took place five years ago. I didn't want anyone to know about it even though five years ago, when it was posted on Youtube, it was the talk of the town. I know that my father had used a lot of money to make everyone in the town to keep their mouth shut about it. I was grateful for that even though sometimes I can still occasionally hear it from the other towns.

I was back at home and safely in my room, lying face first into my pillow on my bed. I didn't want to face anyone. Pushing myself off the bed, I sat down on my bed and rolled up my long sleeved shirt. Exposing my stomach.I had changed out of the dress the minute I got home. I didn't want to be in the dress anymore. It was stupid. I shove it into my closet and shut the door, leaving Rica's high heels next to my bed. I can shove anything into my closet but Rica's heels. She'll kill me if she found out her heels are broken or scratched or even damaged.

It was a long time ever since I took a close look at the scars. I still remembered it clearly in my mind. Everything happened in a blink of an eye. I didn't know what to do. When Liam's friends recorded me changing out from my sweater and to a tank top, they posted it online and made remarks about my scars. They didn't know what actually happened and simply made assumptions. Assumptions that almost made me took my own life away from this world. Liam was right when he said that I was too soft hearted. That I would cry at anything. Everything. He tried to make me forget about the scars that his friends had made. He became severely depressed when he found out that I tried to kill myself.

My suicide attempt failed and I was sent to juvie for about a month until I was released again. It was all because of my parents. They brought me home and forced me to accept the truth. The truth which I can't accept until this very day.

Looking down, I ran my hand up my wrist, feeling the faint scars still there. I used to like how the scars felt on my skin. It made me realized who I really am and what made me do it. I still do it sometimes but it started to lessen four years ago. I wore wrist bands on my wrist to cover the scars up. I felt ashamed of them. I know I shouldn't be because I made my choice to do it. But it was still something I can't add into my life in front of everyone.

Sitting back in my bed, I scratched my head. I've let my hair lose from the tight ponytail just now. It made my head hurt more than ever. Running a hand through the long strands of my hair, I stood up from my bed and went downstairs. There was no one at home today. Mrs Rodriguez had taken the week off to visit her aunt over at Mexico and wouldn't be back until next week. The butler was busy together with his wife because his wife wanted to have chinese food at a restaurant a hundred miles away. I mean, what can the old guy do? His wife is pregnant. He had to do everything to please her or else she'll get mad.

I was all along in the house with nothing to eat and no one to talk too. Liam was off at some party together with his friends again and he's probably going to come back at around midnight after he was done with his friends. It's always like that with him. Going around to the living room, I took the television's remote control up from the coffee table and switched the television on. Sitting down on the couch, I aimed the remote at the television and started choosing which channel to watch.

After a full five minutes of trying to find a nice channel, I ended up watching the Spongebob Squarepants movie. Sponge out of the water. Or maybe it's something like that but I don't know. I'm not too interested in the title of the movie. Hell, I've never even watch Spongebob Squarepants when I'm growing up. I was never one to watch cartoons. I focused my time mainly on school and my ballet dancing class, which I quitted after the incident.