The Grey Wardens' Leader

0.6 - Old Ties

Somewhere In My Car by Keith Urban

A/N: This chapter is abnormal as it will actually mostly be in somebody's point of view (don't get comfy with the thought, dear readers haha), and I think it'll be a little unexpected, so here we go!!

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Tamlen's POV

   I ran threw the wooded area, scratching at my face and wanting the monster inside me desperately to return to its rightful place: outside of my body. I collapsed onto the ground just through the clearing, too weak to even pick my head up to see if I was where I wanted to be.

"T-Tamlen...?", a frail voice called out, as if she couldn't believe that it was really me. But how could I blame her? Anytime I see my reflection, I don't see me...I see somebody else entirely, a monster.

   I slowly stood and backed away,"You, lethallan..." Avril snarled at the people behind her,"Stand down, I know him." She herself put her bow and quiver full of arrows down as she stared at me in disbelief,"Tamlen? Is that- Is that really you...?"

   Stumbling over my feet while I backed up as she inched towards me, I shook my head wildly," Don't come near me! Please, stay away!" Running on fear and instinct, I ran away from the nearly white haired girl, wanting to keep her safe. I know that coming here, I initially wanted to see her, but I...I cannot bear the thought of hurting her.

   Typical Mahariel, her figure running after me and her footprints sloshing messily in the mud. I eventually gave in and looked down at her,"Avril...Lethallan, please. Don't even look at me!" I looked down at the ground and grumbled,"I am...sick."

   She reached out towards me and frowned when I quickly jerked my body away from her hand,"Tamlen we can help you, there is no reason to be afraid." I hugged myself in a feeble attempt to try and bring comfort to my wild emotions,"No! No help! No help for me, Mahariel. The song - the song that's in my head - it...calls to me. He sings to me, I can't stop it!"

   I finally looked into her eyes again and whispered gingerly,"Don't want to...hurt you, lethallan. Please, just...stop me." I had to work quite hard to get my words from my mind to my mouth; they came out broken and slow, I was starting to not even sound like myself anymore. I watched as her lip began to quiver and her knees hit the wet ground,"If you're asking me to kill you, I can't do that. I can't kill you, Tamlen..."

"Then...", the words fell out of my mouth before I could even process what I was saying,"I must leave you no choice." I looked deep into her troubled as as she shakily stood up,"I always...loved you. I'm so...sorry..."

   I brought my fist back and swung at her, but she easily dodged it and ran ahead,"Put me out of...my misery, lethallan!" But no matter how hard I tried to get her to attack me, she wouldn't. Her long blonde hair whipped behind her as she ran from me, trying her best to keep her distance. The people she was with, however, had no trouble with attacking me. There was a dark haired mage, blasting me from afar, as a red head with dual daggers ripped into my sides and a burly man bashed me with his shield.

   My body slowly crumpled to the ground, and I looked up into the night sky, seeing all the stars was remarkable, but I would soon become one with them. The stale taste of bloody filled my mouth, and pain took over as the sole man in the group took his sword and stabbed through my neck. I thrashed and went to hold the deep gash, but my arms felt like they had ten thousand pounds attached to them. A warm, sticky substance soon began to leak out of my mouth as one last thought crossed my mind: that man looks at lethallan like I have for years, and to be entirely honest, even if I was still healthy and strong, she would pick him over me any day. I have always loved her, but she never loved me in such a way...

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Normal POV

   Alistair slowly approached the obviously heartbroken leader and gulped, scared of the response that he might get. He knew it was selfish to want her to forget about the elven man that just professed his love and focus on whatever flirty thing it is that they had, but he couldn't seem to help himself,"Who was that?"

"His name was-", she cleared her throat and wiped her eyes, regaining some of her composure,"His name was Tamlen, he was a good man..."

   The dark blond nodded slowly as he decided it best to let her grieve as she wished and did not even attempt to hug or console her physically,"Tamlen...Then he was the one that was with you when you...I'm so sorry..."

   He frowned deeply and looked at the ground as he spoke,"This is what happens when the taint is left unchecked...It's- It's better for him to have ended it, it was a mercy." The Grey Warden turned on his heel to walk away, but he felt warmth across his back and arms wrap around his torso,"Thank you...For telling me that him dying was a mercy, even if it wasn't...It will help me with the uh...with the grieving process."

   Alistair turned in her arms so that he could return the hug, and gingerly rested his chin atop of her head,"If there is anything more that I can do for you, tell me, okay?" Her nearly black eyes looked up into his and whispered quietly,"Don't leave me alone tonight, I can do this alone..."

   He wiped her tears and choked out his words,"I wouldn't dream of it..."

Word count: 1016