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Where the 🦆 are your parents?
Why the parents always gone? Leaving your 15 year old alone for half a year is called abandonment and neglect.

1)
"I'm going to throw a party so that I can get Brad drunk and in my bed. Good things my parents went on that business trip to South Africa 5 years ago."

2)
"Nah being ditched by my parents didn't leave emotional scars or abandonment issues."

3)
"Shit. A permission slip."

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