Run

Chapter 4

   I go in for a swift kick in the ribs that he very clearly did not expect, before punching him in the face. He grunts as he regains balance and mutters something quite obscene. I get in another hit before he knocks the wind out of me with a punch to my jaw. 

I roll my eyes and kick his legs out from him. Jumping on him, I throw punches to his face and ignore the pain as my skin breaks. Being small, like I am, he eventually managed to flip us, blood from his nose, dripping on me. Pushing at his face as he starts to beat me, I knee him and stand. Kicking him in the face before he knocks me off my feet. 

Clawing at his face again, he punches me in the stomach, making me loose my breath and focus long enough for his to punch my nose. Cursing, I spit the blood in mouth at him. Securing my legs under his, he wraps his big, rough hands around my throat. 

Clawing and thrashing, I try to get him off but I can't. 

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I scream in anger at dying this way. I've survived on my own in a apocalyptic world for this long and I'm going to be murdered by some asshole who wants my supplies. Nice. It's annoying, I thought I was better than this. 

Just as I start to panic, I hear a loud noise and then I'm crushed but luckily the grip on my throat is gone. Choking and gasping, I feel warm liquid seep through my clothes as my eyes snap open. The weight is gone and in place of the man, I see James' shocked and scared face. His mouth is moving fast but I don't hear it. I quickly sit up and swing at him, punching him in the face hard enough to knock him to the ground beside me. 

James shot the man. The blood staining my body is his- thank the lord. I do, however, have some of my own blood trailing down my face. Touching my eyebrow, I flinch and sigh. 

All of a sudden everything comes back and I can hear James cursing as he looks at me upset and confused. "What the hell?" 

Going over to him, I grab the fabric of his shirt and shake him. "What the fuck, James? What the fuck! I could have died when you shot him and if you didn't intervene. Did you even take notice of where you shot him?! It could have gone straight through him and into me! You could have hit him hard enough to get him off me and if you couldn't take him you could have fucking distracted him long enough for me to catch my breath so I could finish him off. You were completely absent minded and irresponsible and just a fucking idiot!" 

He gives me a look as he shouts right back at me. "Are you kidding me!? A thank you would have sufficed." 

"You're a coward." I mumble, dropping him and sitting next to him. My body slumps in both defeat and exhaustion. Laying back, I close my eyes and hope for the dizziness to pass. My throat hurts worse than my face. I know I'm going to have some nasty bruises all over. I shudder at the thought of the bruise that will form on my throat. 

Something holds my arm lightly. My eyes open quickly and I see James face right above mine, inches from me.

My breath picks up again as we both just study each others' face. It's crazy how our emotions keep changing so quickly between the two of us. One minute, I'm ready to kill him and the next we're joking. It must be the adrenaline. 

His eyes are like the ocean, changing with his emotions, normally a plain light blue but in distress, are cloudy and darkened. His jawline razor sharp, straight nose and light pink lips. I look back to his eyes and see his eyes trailing my facial features as well before looking me in the eyes again. 

Slowly my lips turn into a smirk. I sit up and he sits back, getting the hint as he looks away, cheeks turning pink. That's kinda cute. 

Without hiding my smirk, I give him a once over. He has a small cut on his throat and that's it. James looks back at me with worry in his eyes. "Are you okay?" 

Clearing my throat, I nod and so does he after a moment of more worry. "Ok." He stands and offers me a hand and after a moment's hesitation, I take it. 

Falling in the chair at the table, James holds his head in his hands. "I'm not, I'm so sorry." His voice cracks. Sighing, I hate myself for doing so but I place a hand on his shoulder lightly. He seems just as surprised and looks up with glassy eyes.

"I-I never killed anyone before. I-I didn't-didn't mean too. I'm-I-I'm so so sorry." James stutters and looks down, tears dripping from his face. "I know I didn't think it through and you could've been hurt or worse but he was going to kill you- I didn't-"

I sigh and crouch in front of him. Dear god. Glad he can't see my expression, I try wiping away the annoyance from my face before pushing his head up to look at me. "Listen," Debating on what to say, I just get it out. "You gotta grow up a little James." At his incredulous expression, I give him a stern look. I fucking feel like his god damn mom. "However, killing isn't something to take lightly. Death isn't light. This man deserved what he got but it doesn't mean that it meant nothing. In this case, you didn't know what to do and just acted before it was to late. You saved me." 

Biting my lip, I make sure he's listened. James stiffens when I pause and I sigh. 

"When you kill, no matter what it is, there has to be some acknowledgement of death. Maybe not always respect but in this case it works. I have killed before. It's not something to be proud of and I don't make it into anything of the sort. Every kill I make, I always thought about it and thought of it as a horrible thing but a necessity. I never killed if there was another way, I would die if it didn't happen. That's what you must think in this case. There would be more death if he didn't die. It wouldn't just be us he killed. It'd be anyone he wanted things from." 

Grabbing his face in both my hands, I quirk a brow, waiting for his response. 

Slowly, he blinks as he lets out a breath and nods. 

"Good, ok." I give him a half smile and stand, patting his check rather roughly. I go to my bag and grab a first aid kit and a new shirt for me. With my back to him, I rip off the now sticky hoodie, wipe some blood off and put on a long sleeved purple shirt that has a hood. 

Turning around, I chuckle at James. He was kind enough to turn around when I was changing. 

With the first aid kit in my hand, I brought the other chair in front of James and grabbed his face. "Sorry." I chuckle as I clean his eyebrow that I punched and then cleaned the cut on his throat. Closing the kit, I go to put it away but James stops me. "Your hands are busted and your face isn't in great condition either." 

"Thanks." I say with a roll of my eyes. "Just be quick, we still have to clean this up." 

We both look at the mess, the blood and the body. 

Throwing a bottle of water at him, I drink my own and wince at the soreness of my throat. James catches my eye and he has a sad expression on his face. "Put the puppy eyes away and help me with this." 

He gives me a confused look. 

I think for a moment before sighing. Quickly, I pack everything I need before gesturing to James to get out. Ignoring my pain and dumping a small amount of gas that I have out, I set the shed on fire. 

Turning around I ignore James' sad look and mutter, "Lets go." Before we start our journey. It's harder this time, leaving this place. I don't understand why, not really having any attachment to this place. It's just, one more place, one more shitty thing to have happened. One more place for me to have to run from and forget.