Back in time: Phan

16

Dan's POV

I can't do this. What was I thinking? I'm so nervous. I feel like I can barely breathe already. What if Phil ever found out what I did? He'd hate me! That isn't something you can just forgive. Will I ever tell him? He has a right to know about the fact that he died in the future because of me! Would I be thrown back into the future? That would mean that I'd be dead! I regret that decision so badly and I really don't want to die. But Phil. Phil would be dead too. What was the point to life without him?

My body started to feel tingly and I got dizzy. I sat down on the floor, too shaky to even get to a chair. It felt like ice was running through my veins. I want to run away from my body but I can't, of course. I was stuck inside my own head.

Shallow breathing. Heart racing. Total panic.

This is how Phil found me a few minutes later.

_____
Phil's POV

I got back to the apartment and found Dan curled up in a ball on the ground crying and shaking. He looked scared again. I wondered to myself what brought this on. He was having another panic attack but a bad one again. Like the one from two months ago. I kept my distance not wanting to scare him, if you touched him while he was having a panic attack he would lash out. I sat down with my legs crossed about two metres away from him.

Phil: Dan, look at me. You're okay.

Dan looked up and looked surprised to see me sitting there. He probably hadn't heard me walk into the apartment. He looked back down at the floor, crying into his hands.

Phil: I'm going to take deep breaths and I want you to copy my actions okay?

Dan nodded, unable to respond and I started breathing deeply and slowly. Dan watched me desperately, copying my every breath. After another 5 minutes, his breathing had calmed down to a steady pace. I edged myself closer to him to see if he would object but he didn't. I sat down next to him and put my arm around his shoulder, cuddling him. Dan cried a bit but I tried my best to cheer him up.

Phil: You okay?

Dan: *nods* Yes.

Phil: *sighs* What triggered your panic attack?

Dan: Nothing specific. Just thoughts.

Phil: About what?

Dan: People. A person.

Phil: Who?

Dan: *sighs* It doesn't matter. I'm okay now.

Phil: We don't have to get coffee if you're not feeling up to it.

Dan: No, I want to go.

I nodded my head and stood up from the ground. I stretched out my hand to help Dan up, who was still a bit wobbly. I steadied him and got him a glass of water.

After getting ourselves ready, we went out for coffee.