Ashton: Were you a Benji or a Joel girl?
Luke: I WAS A BOY.
--
Calum: ASHTONIO IRWEENIE!
--
Calum: Fuck, Ashton's coming. Everyone hide.
*gets in closet*
Calum: It smells like poop in here.
--
*Talking about their first album*
Calum: My sister's friend's brother gave me a burnt CD-
Ashton: I can't listen to this story.. it involves piracy.
--
Interviewer: Can you name any similarities between you guys and One Direction because you know.. you guys are obviously a bit more punk rock.
Ashton: No, no, yeah.. we have the same genitals.
--
Calum: Hi guys, I'm here with Ashton and we're watching the worst movie ever. It's called The Human Centipede and Ashton was like "this movie is great man, you should watch it"
Ashton: No I never, ever said that!
Calum: And it's about a bunch of people eating each others buttholes.
Ashton: Mmmmmm butthole. *Giggles uncontrollably*
--
*Brushing their teeth*
Michael: Oh my god it smells so bad in here!
Ashton: Because I farted.
--
*Talking about the show*
Ashton: I'm quite nervous... as you CAN see my nipples through this shirt.
Luke: That's how you know Ashton is nervous for a show.
Ashton: My nipples get hard.
--
Calum: Ashton's gonna be a sex slave
Ashton: *taken back* WHAT?! That's not a super hero!
--
Luke: I think it's "hoe" no wait, oh my god that's not it. I'm so sorry."
--
Michael: Ashton you never steal my underwear.
Ashton: Yeah because it's your underwear and it has like your... butt in them and I don't want to wear that.
--
Luke: Welcome back to cheffing with Ashton and Luke!
--
Ashton: Yeah well if they eat testicles in their state I'm gonna eat them.
Michael: I vow right now that I will not be eating testicles.
Ashton: I'll eat testicles.
Luke: I'LL EAT YOUR TESTICLES IF YOU MAKE ME EAT THEM TESTICLES.
--
Luke: Can't one man hug another man from behind?!
Ashton: CAN'T ONE MAN NOT HUG ANOTHER MAN FROM THE BEHIND?!
Calum: .... while they are both naked.
--
*answering questions*
Interviewer: And actually one lady was so persistent I said I would ask for her.
Michael: ahhh
Ashton: ahhhh chicken.
*ashton turns to calum and just starts giggling*
Ashton: I just said chicken for some reason.
--
Interviewer: What would you do if you woke up with pepperoni for nipples?
Luke: Umm well I really like pepperonis so I might eat them...
Ashton: Are they detachable?
*Calum looks confused and disgusted*
Luke: Okay do they just look like pepperoni or are they actually pepperoni? Because if they were real pepperoni I would eat them.
Calum: Luke that's disgusting.
Michael: That's gross cause then you're eating your nipples.
*Luke trying to defend himself*
Luke: Yeah but they're pepperoni not nipples!
--
*talking to Luke*
Michael: No you know what Luke? You are the biggest asshole in the morning.
*Luke trying to defend himself*
Michael: Like even when you're in a good mood you're still a dick.
--
Calum: Tell me how good looking I am.
Ashton: What?
Ashton: Is this a weird thing you want me to do or...
Calum: J-just speak to me.
Ashton: You're a naughty boy Calum.
Calum: More! Tell me more.
--
Luke: Just dropped a peanut in my belly button... do I eat it or...
--
Calum: Me and Ash keep the band... well, we are pretty much the band and these guys just add a bit of treble.
Michael: SORRY CALUM. I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SIZE OF YOUR EGO.
--
Michael: Luke is passed out next to a bowl of nachos. This is the best day of my life.
--
Morning Luke: I'm so tired I almost put this bowl of cereal in the toilet.
--
Ashton: Mikes bod is incredible .
Luke: You should see his wiener.
--
Ashton: IT'S NOT GOING TO SAY HELLO! IT'S A COW LUKE.
--
Calum: It's my microwave!
Ashton: It's not you microwave.
Calum: HEY!
*uncontrollable giggling*
YOU ARE READING
To the band from the fam / 5SOS MESSAGES BOOK
RandomI decided to create this book because I wanted 5sos to know how much the fans love them In this book you will find Messages from the fam Artwork Favourite memories And more I do not own any pictures I have used apart from the front cover Thank...
