Having returned to his home in Cufthill, Fishy felt satisfied. He had investigated and overcame a global weed crisis. He made friends with Snoop Dogg and his fellow teachers at the IIIrd LO. At least he thought so. He was so content with his life, that he even punished the class 1weed a bit less than before. But the thing that Fishy valued most was his Book of Weed®, which was a legendary artifact for any weed maniac like himself.
He once went to a McDonald's restaurant, as his regular hunger was stronger that his weed hunger at that time (which mostly happened to him when he smoked too much and felt the typical munchies). He was enjoying a special offer Weedburger, when one of the dealers he had known for a fairly long time, greeted him, sat next to him and said:
-You bought exactly a quintal of stuff from me so far. Now, my gracious customer, we shall drink to our alliance! Having said that, he poured some water into the two glasses he brought with himself. Kinda misunderstanding the idea of drinking, Fishy thought. He was about to take a sip when a scruffy looking Brit ran into the bar, shouting:
-Al'ight, I av an urgnt messge for ye, thar's dis plastyc boull, full af som wooa liquid. It's not oowa, it's poison. Soa, if aneibodei has draunk that, you go tu tha ospitl, 'coz it's tha raung staff and I'm nit avin' a laaf, I'm fooken deadley seeriouws!
-Now you've gone over the top this time! All I was trying to do was to add a „two" to „H two O*"! -The dealer said, pulling a knife and stabbing him several times.
The customers left the building in panic. Fishy, who'd left his 'k at home, decided to remove himself from the scene. Having arrived at home, he got out of his weedmobile and went into his house. He greeted his wife and children, whose scars were barely visible already. He did all the regular evening routine, including the evening weed, and went to sleep.
The next day, it was pretty much cloudy. Fishy drove to work and as soon as he left his vehicle, it started raining heavily. His blunt of weed accidentally extinguished, he had to finish smoking in the teachers' restroom.
-Shouldn't we let the students go on vacation already? It's July! - Mr. Froggy said, being Fishy's newly appointed tactician.
-No, my Watson! How am I going to smoke weed on my way to work if I won't have any work for two months? Think about my needs. Do something productive, for Snoop's sake. (Actually it was a cheap excuse, Fishy simply forgot that the schoolyear was due to end already.)
A few hours later, Froggy entered Fishy's study and flinched slightly, seeing his 'k put against the wall.
-I have drawn up a plan of invasion! We will raid our wortestest enemy, the Ist LO!
-Why would we do that, you moron?!
-Because everybody knows they have tons of weed hidden in their basement. They have their reputation for a reason!
-YOU HAVEN'T TOLD ME ABOUT THE WEED OF THE IST LO BEFORE?! I should stuff you with lead like a pincushion for that. Execute the attack and don't disappoint me. I'll be waiting.
-Sir, yes sir.
Froggy gathered a number of students and went for the Ist LO. Fishy, distrustful of his sidekick, went to watch the whole scene from the rooftops. He saw how they taunted, attacked, and eventually broke through the main gate of the Ist LO. A few minutes later, he realized that the whole building had been set on fire, and students evacuating the war zone had no weed on them! Fishy realized that if there indeed was any ganja to be found there, it would burn thanks to the great fire and cause a dramatic high in at least half the city's population. He was quite cool with that, since he would feel the effects as well. He took out his hammock and somehow mounted it on one of the rooftops. He started to sunbathe, (which was quite hard because of the crappy weather) and breathe in the smoke, ignoring Molotovs and rocks thrown by the desperate Ist LO students. A few minutes later the whole racket stopped, since everybody was either high or gone. Fishy had the sense of a job well done. The next day, he officially congratulated Froggy and his students for finally besting their worst enemy. He also officially ended the school year, realizing that Froggy deserved a leave for his heroic deeds. He decided to pack his belongings and take his family to the coast..
* A bit of chemistry - H₂O is simply water as opposed to H2O2, which has numerous uses in life, but does great harm when drunk.
YOU ARE READING
Fishy's Adventures
General FictionHere you are, in front of the work of nearly three years of my life. To put it in the fewest words possible: this is a story about a Math teacher who is addicted to marijuana. In the thirty chapters of the story, I pit him against the most ridiculou...
