Lift // Hamliza

• chapter 27 •

• Alexander •

I knew I overreacted towards both John and Eliza, but now they were both gone and I couldn't apologize to either. So I sat with Herc and Laf in silence at our table. Deciding I wasn't hungry, I pulled out my homework that was assigned for tonight and began to work on it. We still had half a period of lunch left so I had a god amount of time.

Soon enough Eliza and John came back in, laughing and talking to each other. Usually I'd be jealous, but I knew John was gay and currently dating another John at our school, John André. They were an unlikely couple, but definitely a cute one. Liza took the hand I wasn't working with and held it as she sat down next to me, causing me to look up. She smiled sadly at me and I tried to shake away the weird feeling it gave me. I didn't want or need her pity. I didn't need help. I was fine.

I saw John glance at me a lot but I still kept my head down and on my work, refusing to look at him to see the inevitable pain that was in his eyes, because I knew Eliza must've told him what I did.

"Are we just going to sit in silence guys? Alex and Eliza, tell us about the competition in January." Hercules finally said, breaking the awkward tension over the table. I glanced to Eliza and she nodded at me, obviously wanting me to explain.

"Um, well, we're competing as a duet in at this dance competition across New York City. We have most of our dance done already, we just gotta clean it up and design costumes." I said, giving a brief explanation without really meeting eye contact with anyone. I did lock eyes with John for just a moment though, and I realized they were a little pink and he gave me a look of sympathy. Yeah, he knew.

I continued to work as the table chatted around me until the bell rang. I collected all my stuff and kissed Eliza quickly, ready to head to my next class.

"Hold on, let me walk you." She said with a smile, grabbing my free hand.

"But you'll be late to French?" I said. Our classes were on the opposite sides of the school.

"Eh. I'll tell Mademoiselle Goldsberry that I had to go to the office or something. She loves me anyways." She shrugged. I was a little surprised; Liza never wanted to be late, she was the perfect student. But the fire in her eyes told me she wasn't going to give up on this, and I finally just went with it.

We walked through the halls of the school fairly slowly. We had five minutes between classes and I didn't need to go to my locker so I had time. She started talking after a very short period of silence.

"Before you say anything, you're not allowed to interrupt me or walk away during this, ok? Alex, I know you don't want to but I really think you need help. Doing it once causes an avalanche effect; it starts as a small snowball but keeps growing and getting bigger and more deadly. I don't want you hurt or worse. I love you. I really think we should talk to someone." She said. I knew this was coming and I sighed as soon as she said the first sentence, not even trying to fight like before.

"I don't know what to do. I can't pay for a therapist and I'm not letting you have your family pay. I don't think a hotline would help. What other options do I have?" I asked exasperatedly.

"The school counselor. We could go together and they'll keep it all confidential, plus it's free and an easy resource." She said, obviously she had thought this through for a while.

"Fine." I said after about a minute of silence. She beamed up at me with that gorgeous Schuyler smile and began pulling me in the other direction towards the main office.

"Cmon. I think our classes for the rest of the day will be fine without us."