Broken

A Pain That Can't Heal

The killer had been silent almost all of the day. He didn't feel the need to move, the need to cry. Nothing at all.

He was completely empty.

How long...How long could he keep deluding this existence. It had been this way ever since, ever since he did what he had done to the girl chained up. This never ending feeling of dread and pain, was killing him and he hated it.

Jeff had murdered many , many people and not shed a tear. Yet when it had came to this one in particular person, his emotions were as torn as rags. He didn't understand the pain..

So he beat her, and he beat her and repeated it until he just stopped. She just...accepted it. She didn't struggle, she did not resist. She just sat there and smiled all the while telling him that it's not his fault, that he would get better..

That she understood him.

Why? Why was she just accepting him for what he was?! Why did she not act like every other victim that he had taken over the years. True, that they had been acquainted since child hood. But , it just made no sense how she could accept him so much.

"Stop it.."

He repeated internally to himself as the image of her weak, pained smile just repeated inside his skull.

"I don't want to care anymore..Stop..Stop smiling , stop understanding me.."

Jeff gripped his head and felt that horrible, stabbing pain in his heart that never ended whenever that girl entered his mind. How he, loathed her. Loathed this painful feeling that seemed to last an eternity.

Standing up, he began his descent to the basement. He had to face up to the horrendous act that he had bestowed upon her that other night. It was bad enough that he got so angry and lashed out, but worse still...Jerry, Jerry witnessed what he had done. 

"I have to make it right with her...With him, with this messed up family of mines."

The killer took a breath as he pushed the door open, he watched as the girl, chained to the pole scrambled away from him . Her eyes wide with terror and fear, she looked like a complete mess of stress and lack of sleep.

"Look...Krystal."

The man stated, staring at the terrified, chained female. She was trembling with anxiety.

"Please, please stop staring at me like that.."

He begged but, she just hugged her knees and rocked, this made him growl as he slammed his fist into the wall and yelled, causing her to start whimpering. Jeff took a breath and relaxed his temper.

"I am not a good person, you fucking know me. But for gods sakes, Krystal. I am still a man, I am still human...I am a fucking messed up disaster. But, I am trying. I am trying my hardest to be normal, to be ... even a husband, a father.. But I can't just..CHANGE, I can't become someone else. I will ALWAYS , be deranged, I will ALWAYS, fly off my handle. I won't be a prince charming.."

Jeff felt his tears falling down his face as he looked at the woman chained up.

"I never asked for this,  I never asked to be born a monster."

He collapsed to his knees and shook violently, a small amount of vomit escaping him from the stress.

"All I am asking...is that you don't ... "

The male froze as he felt a hand on his cheek, his warm tears slipped through her fingers and he grasped the hand tightly. He trembled even harder than before.

"Yes, Jeff . You are a fucked up disaster."

She said, sending a dagger of ice into his heart. He looked at her, the same smile on her face, how could she smile after saying that?

"But , I am a messed up disaster too, so is Jerry, and so is half of humanity. Get it? You are not the only messed up person that has been created in this world. So stop thinking that it's you on your own. Know why I have never left, even after everything you've done to me?"

Krystal stated

"Cause you have a serious case of Stockholm syndrome and you only care for the kids safety?"

The man muttered lowly, not keeping her gaze as his tears dripped. Krystal made him look up into her eyes.

"Because, I made a promise to you. I swore to you that I wouldn't give up on you. That I'd make sure to stay by your side, even if everyone left. I made a promise that I'd stay by your side. Because I am your friend. I have seen aspects of the former you that have surfaced. He's still alive inside the chaotic storm that you are having within. And I won't give up on you until you're better. You're not evil,  Jeff. You're ill."

Jeff laid his head against hers and shuddered. This pain, it hurt him so badly..but yet..It was a pain that he oddly yearned..something that he in his youth, severed at the hand of a knife. The man was powerless in the embrace of the woman, who took the role of his 'fake' wife. 

"I won't leave, even if you push me away, because... I'm your best friend..and.. I won't give up on you. Jefferey."

Krystal said into his hair, her arms coiled around his neck.

They were a messed up duo, but in the chaos of everything. A best fried, will always understand you, even as sick as you can be.

--

:D

A short story.