save me | p.jm

twenty three

"Is that supposed to be romantic?" she asked, half confused and half flattered with my statement.

I shrugged, "I guess so."

She squinted her eyes at me but then she quickly looked away and smiled like nothing happened. I'm glad we're able to escape that unknown topic I opened.

"Hey I have to ask you something that has been a mystery to me." she asked, laughing. I felt the ease that it'll turn something funny.

"What is it?"

"When we met again in that building, why were you acting so strange?" she asked and looked at me curiously.

I fell silent and she opened her mouth to rephrase her question.

"Okay, why did you act like we didn't know each other?" she asked, propping her chin on her hand.

I'd looked for words but it turned out shy, "Because I guess avoiding you might change my feelings toward you."

She looked surprised and dumbfounded at the same time, "What do you mean?" she asked again.

"Well, I didn't really want to force myself in your life if you already have a boyfriend right? or shall I say had." I said, keen to explain her everything what she wanted me to say.

She laughed and hit my arm playfully, "So you're telling me that you were jealous?" she asked, smiling.

I nodded, "You can say that."

She laughed and wrapped her arms around me, "Little cold Jimin went jelly jelly before huh." she teased, I laughed with her.

"But seriously not about that though," she paused and drew a long breath, "I mean the way you treated me last time."

The atmosphere change into something serious and I felt the cold wind hit us, her hair going wild.

I felt my heart ache that I might hurt her through my unspoken words.

"C'mon you can tell me and I promised that this conversation will never change the way we hang out." she beamed, I smiled because she's the only one who understood me truly.

"Well remember last time? You pushed me away, I have to admit that it felt like daggers stabbing on my heart again and again. I was really mad at you because of what you did, have to cry even though there isn't tears anymore. I felt lonely after that, the aid was really strict that her eyes are always on me whenever I do a move." I paused when I felt like crying.

"And the most hurtful thing is that you left me twice without even saying a goodbye, that hurts right? So I'll always make sure that when I leave, I'll say goodbye."

She looked stunned at my words, I looked at her like this is our last time of meeting each other.

"All of those, it left a wound on my heart. I felt like killing myself, yes I was a suicidal and I'm glad that because of that, we met again unexpectedly."

I laughed bitterly, "Isn't that amazing? Everything has a connection, the world will always find a way to destine the people who haven't met again."

I felt like that my mouth isn't going to stop what I wanted to tell her before I die but it's her fault for making her do this.

"I'm sorry.." she apologized, looking down to her lap, "I made you like this, I hurt you when no one has ever did."

I smiled and lifted her chin, "Hey, that was then, this is now."

She smiled and looped her arm to mine.

"And by the time you left when we were kids, I woke up in the hospital knowing that my mother died. I felt like wanted to jump off a cliff screaming, that was a big mystery for me when I was a kid. I later just found out that there was a bomb planted under our house and it went boom afterwards."

Jiyeon gasped and held my hand tightly. I squeezed her hand to assure her that I'm fine.

"We didn't know why there was a bomb planted there but all I knew that it was planned by someone, someone that we shouldn't trust."

"How did I know all of this? Well dad left a letter saying all of the things he never have said to me before he left me. I went to our old house, it was abandoned and it was off limits. I was surprised to see the pieces of the bomb but more surprised when it left an evidence."

She leaned closer to me.

"There were engraved letters that said Kim."

Jiyeon gasped like she knew all of this but then later on, her tears rolled down her cheek.