Sitting by a pool with her girlfriend and a stunning view of Southampton, whilst sipping on cocktails pretending to be posh, this surely had to be life...well, the weather could do with some brightening up, but other than that, Rachel couldn't complain, everything else was perfect. The ship would be leaving for at least another hour, so it was probably best not to fret about the minor things and start thinking about just how awesome this trip was going to be.
Being Rachel's first trip on a cruise ship, it wasn't far removed that she'd be filled with anticipation, the premise of being out at sea without anywhere other than the confines of the ship to go when not docked at one of the many excursion destinations, opposed by the idea that the ship was so large that it would probably take the first three days to fully explore and partake in everything that there was to offer.
Would she make use of all these pools before the end of the trip? Would she have the chance to make the most of all the excursion opportunities? Would she be able to get tipsy at every one of the bars onboard? So many things to do, so little time.
She had initially been reluctant to join her parents and grandmother, there was nothing conceivably worse than being stuck in a confined space with three bigoted people, even if they were blood. In fact, that probably only compounded matters. Still, there were benefits to coming along and maybe, just maybe, she could knock something into their clouded skulls, besides, it wasn't as though the two of them didn't have their own dirt and in the worst case scenario, she'd just highlight the glaring double standards that this family seemed to thrive on. They could say many things about her, but if there was one thing she wasn't, a liar and coming from self-proclaimed Christians, the irony was mind-boggling.
If there was any crime she was ever guilty of, it was the crime of lying to herself, once upon a time pretending to be someone she wasn't, but that girl, that girl who kept convincing herself that she was something else, that girl was gone now and she'd never return, not to this world.
As she watched her girlfriend's lips move and sip from the straw - yes, a straw in a cocktail -, her mind zoned back to a time when she had lied to herself the most, a time before she moved out, a time when she had just graduated.
Her graduation should have been something magnificent, a feeling of elation, but instead she could only recall relief, relief that it was all finally over. Even the first class degree did nothing to really improve her mood, she just wanted the hassle her parents were making over her done with, which meant trudging through a tedious day of wearing the most uncomfortable gown ever, sitting, collecting a certificate, more sitting, fake celebrations and photos.
It was also a little sad, her life had only really begun to turn a corner towards more positivity in the final year and it was the same people who made that a possibility that she'd be leaving behind, as they went about their separate ways, not knowing if they would ever cross paths again. Some might say that was a cynical way of looking at things, but she had to be honest with herself, some people were destined to remain friends, some simply weren't regardless of how hard one might try.
Some people had the luck of finding everything they wanted at university, love, enlightenment, friendship, partying and more, she on the other hand found very little and she was only stepping into the world more confused and less enlightened, at least non-academically, than ever before.
Before long, she was back at home with an entire summer to look forward to and a world of opportunities just looming over the horizon and yet it felt more daunting than exciting. What would her life be in the next few years, let alone ten years onwards? Would her degree serve her well? Would she find the man of her dreams, get married and have kids? Would her friends remain friends? Where would this grand and free ocean of opportunities take her?
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Cryptophobia - Hell & High Water
Horror(Book 2 of the Cryptophobia series) Just before London falls to its knees, the largest cruise-ship in the world, the MS Heaven of the Seas sets sail on its long 9 day voyage across the Atlantic Ocean from Southampton towards the Caribbean. Having to...