The Darkness Within

Chapter 2

Ah what a day Jano thought with a smile as she lay in the soft grassy field about a mile from the training centers. Peace and quiet.

Not too quiet a voice appeared in her head.

"Ben." She sat up scanning the land around her. He walked towards her from the creek. His face held that familiar smirk, but hearing what she had called him, he gave her a stern glare. "Ren, sorry."

"Thanks." He sat down beside her.

"You've learned the reading of minds very well."

"Well, I had a pretty good teacher." Jano gave a lopsided grin.

"Yes. I guess I am a good teacher." His hair flipped back as he puffed out his chest. "I'm just kidding, Jano. If you didn't learn so quickly it wouldn't have gone so well."

There was a peaceful silence. Jano laid down in the grass and breathed in the fresh air. After several minutes Jano turned to Ben. He seemed deep in thought and his forehead was creased with either anger or confusion.

"Ren." He slowly pulled away from his thoughts. "Are you alright?"

"Yes. I-I'm just.. No. Yes, I'm fine." He said deciding not to tell her. He wanted to turn away from her, he felt the strange need to find somewhere damp and dark. To think. Alone. Just as he had decided to leave, a hand began rubbing his forehead.

"What are these, Ren? You are too young to have wrinkles." Jano muttered tracing the wrinkles on his head. Please, dear friend, she said focusing on his brown eyes  Tell me.

"I'm no longer a padawan, I am now an apprentice, age does not treat me well." He looked back intently  I wish I could.

"As am I, but there are no marks on my face." She pulled up her bangs and showed him her head. Why can't you?

Ren pulled his gaze away and looked back with misty eyes. "You are too innocent, Jano. I don't want to stain you with my thoughts." He jumped up and ran before she could stop him.

"Ben." But the name was heard only by the grass and trees surrounding her.

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}three weeks later{

The world seemed dark and cold that night. Even though there was a bright lantern hanging by the door, something inside of her was cold. She was scared of the feeling that preyed on her. Several times she had felt this same pain inside of her. But it had passed. Master Luke was so busy with all the padawans, that he rarely trained any of the other children. There was of course Master Siku. But he was off searching for newborns that were capable of using the Force. So she had no one to talk to about this feeling. Often now, darkness seemed a friend, it was always there, never very pushy, but it was constant. Unlike people.

Jano had seen Ren several times since their last meeting in the field. But they didn't talk then. She'd often feel someone watching her or sense that someone was reading her thoughts. Often times, it was Ren. She longed to talk to him. To confide in him. He seemed so wise to her, though he was merely a year older. But whenever she went to approach him, she would turn away. She was afraid of what he'd say if he knew of her doubts. Perhaps he was avoiding her for exactly that reason. That's it. He's searched my thoughts and seen my doubts. Tears pricked her eyes. He is ashamed of me.
That was another thing that she wondered about, but did not dwell on, so that no one would read the thoughts. She wondered why she felt so close to him. Of course there was natural affection that the Jedi held for all things, but this did not feel like simple acceptance and grace. It felt deeper. But that wasn't allowed. According to the Jedi laws, deep feelings for one person were not feelings to dwell on.

Slowly. So very slowly, Jano drifted to sleep. She had barely dosed off when the clash of sabers and loud yelling woke her.