The Darkness Within

Chapter 10

It had been days since they had arrived at the Resistance base. Jano had no idea what planet or system they were in. She had been examined and treated by the very best medical personnel. It was a painless recovery and she thought she was well enough to resume her training. She hadn't seen Poe since he came to check on her in the med bay the day after they had arrived. He must've been busy. Still, she wondered where he was and if she could find him. After asking several people for directions, and walking through a great many passages, she found herself standing in front of the door to his quarters. She hesitated for a moment, then knocked softly on the door.

"Poe? It's Jano."

She heard some rustling inside and soon the door opened and a disheveled Poe appeared.

"Hey, how you feelin? The doctors get you all fixed?" He asked while motioning for her to come in.

She came in and sat on a small stool in a corner of the room.

"Might take a little bit longer to be completely healed, but I'm going to resume my training."

Poe looked down and gave a small grunt. He looked up and almost said something but changed his mind.

"Poe, what is it?" Jano said trying to read his thoughts.

"Jano. You can't just do that. You can't just read thoughts without consent, at least not mine. We're friends! You can't just do whatever you want!"

Shocked by his outburst Jano froze. "Why are you saying this?"

"It's... just that... he did that... Jano he tried forcing my mind and it was torture. I...can't help thinking that you will grow to be more and more like him..."

"How can you say that??" She practically shouted. "I am nothing like that creature. We are two completely different people with very different ideas of how the Force should be used. His plan is to subject the world, I was taught as a Jedi to defend the helpless and protect the hope of the balance. I don't want to hurt anyone. So don't you dare say that I am anything like that man." Jano ran down the corridors and out onto a cliff far beyond the base. You must admit you've flirted with the idea. You love the feeling of power and control you get when wielding the Force. And just look at your past. Are you better than this dark lord? You leave destruction wherever you go. Ahch-To, Jakku. Who knows... you might leave this place as it too burns to the ground. The darkness called. No no no! Jano clutched her head trying to claw out the thoughts.

Instinctively she reached for her lightsaber, touching the marks always seemed to calm her like Ben was still there. But it was gone. Oh my god. It's gone. Ben's saber. No. No. How could I let this happen? Overcome by her emotions, Jano couldn't move. She couldn't think. She slowly lay down on a mossy rock and screamed. It wasn't a scream of fear or of anger, it was a scream of utter and complete anguish. The last piece of her history, the last shred of Ben. Gone. Inside she felt a very distinctive crack. Poe had been searching for her and heard her cry. He ran towards her and pulled her to him. Jano grabbed his jacket and drawing him close, trying to breathe in the light that he possessed. How is the darkness so tempting? Why can't I ignore its call?

"Jano, hey hey. What's wrong? You know I didn't mean what I said back there. You're nothing like him."

"I-I-it's not that. I lost..." Jano said choking on a sob. "I lost the saber."

"I'm so sorry. We can find another or make another." He said trying to comfort her. His heart pounded with her so close to him, holding onto him so desperately, as if she needed him more than air.