Past Passages

Journal 8

      I don't see Josiah at all over the next week and by then, I've come to terms with my situation. I've thought thoroughly about what Fenly said and realized two things.

     1) I should be helping Josiah with these weird creatures out on the loose, not giving him shit every time I see him. In light of everything happening, I realize that Josiah ready did save me from the academy. Well, not that I was in any real danger, because I can take care of myself just fine. But I can see now that he was legitimately worried about me and that's why he did what he did. Besides, with these creatures on the loose, getting into a good institute should be the least of my worries.

      And 2) I want Josiah. Really badly. And I'm determined to have him.

      Of course, I'm not going to admit any of this to him when I see him again. If I see him again. I'm not stupid. He'd hold it over my head for the rest of my life and I'm not willing to give him that kind of power over me. So the next time I see him, I'm going make things right. My way.

      Although I don't see Josiah, I do see that shadow following me everywhere. It's gone most nights but come daytime, I see it outside my window, just outside the school, in the mall Sarah tries to drag me to every day, everywhere.

      I've tried chasing it a few times just to see who it is and why their following me but whenever I turn to face them they disappear.

      Maybe it's the academy keeping an eye on me. They've never done that before, though, and I can't think of any reason why they'd do it now.

      Whoever it is it doesn't matter. I've got more important things to worry about than a secret admirer. Everyday this week, Fenly has been coming by to keep me in the loop about the academy and hide out here. Just yesterday he told me Suzanne disappeared, although not like the rest of them. She ran away to avoid getting called for a mission, just like Fenly. Except, unlike Fenly, she cut her tracker out of her ear, so no one knows where she is or has any way to get in contact with her.

     Besides Amy's bonding attempts and dinner, I don't see these foster parents much. They usually leave me to my own devices, which is great. And I haven't seen or heard David beat on Amy lately, but just because I don't hear it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. She still comes out of their room with new bruises to hide almost every morning.

     After school today I rush back to the house to write and empty my head a little. David isn't home since he doesn't get off work until six and Amy is cooking in the kitchen when I get there.

     "Welcome home, Selene." She greets me. "Do you want to help me cook?"

     "Sorry, homework." I respond then run to my room and close the door behind me.

      Not even ten minutes later I hear a knock at the door. I hear Amy go answer it. "Oh, hello Fenly. Selene is up in her room."

      He stomps up the stairs loudly on purpose so he doesn't surprise me like last time. He quiets down when he reaches my room and softly closed the door behind him.

       "Anything?" I ask.

       Fenly takes a seat on my bed. "Nothing yet, but she's got to be okay. Suzanne can take of herself."

      "But she's not as strong as me, or Josiah, or you. What if those things go after her?"

      "She's been staying in at night, that I know for sure. She'd started doing that even when she was still at the VHA."

      I hesitate then. "And Josiah?"

      Fenly's eyebrows fly up. "Why the sudden interest?"