Past Passages

Journal 9

Josiah's seafoam green eyes are dark with anger, his shoulders squared back and tense, and every muscle in his arms is bulging.

His obvious rage aside, I can't tear my eyes away from the large dark bruise at his right temple, the stitches above his left eyebrow and on his right shoulder, and the bloody gauze wrapped around his left calf.

"Oh my God, what happened?" I whisper, knowing he can hear me, as I rush to inspect his injuries. I move to place my hand on his cheek but he recoils from me. "What? What's wrong?" I ask.

When he speaks his voice is rough and just barely audible. "How long?"

"How long, what?" I ask, taken aback now.

"HOW LONG-" he realizes he's screaming and stops and paces.

His outburst made me jump at first but when I realize it's me he's mad at, I quietly take a seat on the bed. There's so many things he could be mad at me for doing at this point, but I refuse to say anything until I know exactly which thing he's found out about.

He takes his hands angrily through his hair once more before stopping in front of me. "How long have you been fucking Fenly?"

My heart stops and my jaw drops. "Oh." And that's really all I can say.

Josiah stares at me, still waiting for an answer. Then he gives a short humorless laugh. "He's my best friend, Selene. How could you- Why would you-" he breaks off and starts pacing again.

These so many things I have to tell him now and so many things to apologize for I don't even know where to start. So I choose to start at the easiest place.

I stand and grab Josiah's arm, pulling him towards the edge of the bed. "Sit down, you're hurt."

He actually does sit and then I reach under the bed to grab my emergency first aid kit. All his pacing opened his calf wound and blood has started dripping down his leg from under he wrap. I kneel in front of him, pull on some gloves, and start undoing the wrap around his leg.

"I, uh, I'm sorry for how I treated you since getting kicked out of VHA." I start as Josiah watches me with hooded eyes. The wound underneath the gauze turns out to be a deep, jagged, six inch gash. Fresh, maybe about a couple hours old from the looks of it. I try not to think about what sort of creature did that, because I know it couldn't have been a vampire or any sort of blade. I clean it with alcohol and start putting new gauze on it and wrapping his leg with a cloth wrap from just below his knees down to his ankle. "I realized, now, that you really were trying to look out for me. I'm sorry I didn't see it earlier. I'm glad you saved me and I want to make it up to you." I finish with his leg and take a seat next to him on the bed, pulling off the gloves.

"What made you just realize that?" he finally asks.

"Fenly." Even as the name leaves my mouth I wince. That was the wrong answer. "He told me about the monsters you guys are facing at the academy. When you told me, I thought you were lying so I would forgive you but Fenly told me about the people who died and went missing. About Suzanne."

"Oh, I see." Josiah nods as if in understanding. "And was that before or after you guys fucked?"

I groan. "Josiah, we aren't-"

"Don't lie to me, Selene! I saw him! I saw you both! Meeting at the mall. At the park. Him coming here everyday for the past week and not leaving until just before David gets home. I saw it all."

At the mall? At the park? Here? That shadow following me this whole time was him?

"You know when I saw you two at the mall," Josiah continues, "I didn't think much of it. But then I heard you at the park, Selene. I heard you talking about it. So don't lie to me. How long have you guys been fucking around behind my back?"