Dating the Dead • lrh

43. unconditionally

"Ey, show me that 'winner' smile." Ashton was holding up his phone way above his head so I could fit in the picture.

I looked up at the camera and smiled. "For someone who lost at every game, you're awfully cheery," I said once we're done taking photos.

We were sitting cross-legged on the floor. Since he seemed adamant not to leave me alone in the house with a sleeping brother, we ended up playing Scrabble for more than an hour already. He lost every game.

"Eh, I'm just letting you win," he shrugged then broke into fits of laughing. "Seriously though, how are you good at this?"

"We grew up playing this." I told him as we returned the letter tiles into the bag. "You hungry at all?  I'm gonna go get us sandwiches."

He looked like he was going to protest but I was already out the door. When I got to the kitchen I didn't know what Ashton liked in his sandwich so I took a wild guess and pulled out the Vegemite. As I was going back up, I heard a loud thud at the living room.

"Are you okay, Ben?" I called, steadying the plate on my hand. I was going to take a closer look but then I heard his snores. Shaking my head, I went back to my room.

"Hey, do you need help?" Ashton said, looking up from the guitar he was tuning.

"I got it, gonna go back down, though. Ben had fallen on his ass," I laughed, placing the plate on the bed next to him. "I didn't know what you like so I went for the default Vegemite."

Ashton set the guitar on the other side of the bed and grabbed a sandwich. "I love Vegemite," he said, biting on it. "Arenshugunnagewan."

"I didn't understand a word. Hold on there, I'll go get some juice."

I returned to the kitchen, grabbing the box of apple juice and two plastic cups. Before I made my way back, I made sure Ben was okay. The idiot was sleeping soundly on the floor.

"Ben, you might wanna wake up. It's almost three in the afternoon."

"Ten minutes," mumbled on the rug.

I placed the juice and cups on the tea table. Since I was holding a cold box, I placed my hand on Ben's cheek lightly. "Get back on the couch, then. You'll wake up sore on the floor."

He lifted his head, squinted his eyes at me. "Who are you?"

"It's Luke," I sighed, "where's everyone?"

"Out."

"I can see that but where-" I glared at my already snoring brother. My expression softened knowing that he's finally catching up with much needed sleep. I owe my family a lot. "Thank you."

I stood up, gathering the rations and walked back to my room. Ashton was playing softly on the guitar, humming along to it with his eyes shut. The tune sounded familiar but I couldn't put my finger on it.

"What's the song?" I asked, placing the juice and cups on the bedside table. My gaze lingered on the framed picture a second too long, not catching what Ashton had said. I turned to face him, "Come again?"

"The song was 'Unconditionally'," his eyes trained on me then to the bedside photo, expression drastically changing, "it was, uh, it was one of Shelby's favorite," he said, clearly distracted.

I picked the picture up and sat on the floor, my back leaning against the bed. "You miss her, too, don't you?" I stared longingly at the photo of us in our onesies, making a funny face for the camera.

"Yeah," he cleared his throat. "Um, sorry I took your guitar without permission. Jack told me you're not allowed to be in a loud environment." He stood up and withdrew the guitar on my bed.

As he walked to return the instrument on its stand across the room, I blurted. "Will you play that song for me?"

He stopped midway and looked at me. "I don't think it's-"

"Please? I can tolerate soft music," I coaxed, but he doesn't seem convinced. "How about on the piano? Can you play it?" My hands shook terribly, losing the grip on the picture. It landed on the floor with a crack.

Ashton started to approach me but I held out a shaky hand. "Are okay?" He slowly walked to me, placing the guitar on the bed.

I nodded, although, I was breathing in short huffs. My hands fumbled with the bottle in my jean pocket. I popped two of the mint pills and swallowed.

Ashton poured some apple juice in a cup and offered to me. When I refused, as I was already calming down, he chugged it down himself. "Sorry, I was in mid-panic," he eyed me warily, "are you sure you're fine, though?"

I took a deep breath and flashed him a smile. A real one. "Yeah, sorry about that. There were too many emotions. I got anxious asking you to play and excited and sad and I- I just-"

"I understand, Luke," he held up a hand, "no need to talk yourself into another nervous breakdown."

"Okay," I said with a shaky breath, bending to pick the frame up. The glass cracked from the top left corner and branched towards Shelby's face. "Must get that fixed," I muttered, gently placing it on the bedside table. "Um, if you wanna play, the piano's downstairs."

He still watched me carefully even as he took the other plastic cup from my slightly trembling hand. "Will hearing the piano make you calm down?" He asked to which I responded with a small nod. His lips curled up to a smile, somewhat looking sad. "Okay."

I led the way downstairs to the piano in the living room. Ben was still passed out on the couch and Lukey on the piano seat. The ginger gremlin hissed at me rather maliciously.

"I hate you too," I told the feline, as it scampered away when I pulled the seat further away from the instrument. I stood straight and faced Ashton who had just placed the juice box and plastic cups on the tea table. "We weren't hostile like this," Ashton looked at me as I cleared my throat so that my voice don't crack, "before. We were civil before the accident. Now, he's always like that. Most of the times, it's not even directly at me. Like, he sees something behind me and, and-"

Ashton placed a hand on my shoulder to stop me from rambling. I looked at him blankly. "You okay? You were staring straight ahead so-"

"Oh," I blinked furiously, keeping myself together, "yeah, yeah, yeah."

He looked unconvinced but he took a seat in front of the piano. I sat at the couch's arm and shut my eyes at the starting note. My cheeks felt cold.

"I miss her so much," I didn't make a move to wipe my tears escaping from my closed eyes. "When do you think she'll be back?"

"She's not-" I heard him say softly but my words drowned out his as he continued playing.

"Jack said she'll be back soon when she gets better. I will wait for her. I'll wait..."

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