Ruler [Blood Magic, Book 3]

Chapter 21: Every Move You Make

"Shield," Keel said, as we stepped back into the elevator. "We'll run into a lot more Nosferatu going up to the warehouse."

Heat rushed to my cheeks. Another error. I should have had my protective barrier up by now but I was still reeling from Keel's request in arena. Kill for me. A fresh shiver raced up the length of my spine. No. I sent all those complicated feelings at my magic as I refreshed the blood that fuelled my shield. It re-materialized around us almost instantly.

"Sorry." I wanted to take back my apology as soon as I'd uttered it. It seemed so human, so weak, so exactly what I wasn't supposed to be here.

Arthos' months of lessons made me more confident but they didn't stop my biology from getting in the way. Not unlike Keel's, I reminded myself. But he had a blindness to that, and seemed unlikely to give me any slack.

He resumed his death grip on my arm before the doors slid open at our destination, indicating that any free talk was done. My gaze dropped to the floor before I realized I couldn't spot threats that way, and straightened my head. Look at everyone, but no eye contact, I told myself. You can do this.

Another yank on my arm got me moving and Keel and I traversed the corridors at a brisk pace. As His Majesty predicted, we encountered several Nosferatu on the way. All stopped and kneeled in deference to their king, though that didn't prevent  them from casting suspicious looks at me. I'd been here for months, but public sentiment showed no sign of softening. Maybe I should have taken the opportunity to be scary rather than just hated. No. Don't even think like that.

I kept the shield strong and steady as we progressed through the compound. If so much as the tiniest bit of blood scent leaked through, it'd be enough to tell them that it wasn't just in my veins. That something else was going on here. Keel remained silent as we walked, focused on our destination, but no doubt as aware of potential dangers as I was.

As we exited the compound and entered the storage complex above, his grip began to loosen. I didn't share his relief. While the danger of a Nosferatu attack up here in the human world was close to zero, I refused to allow my shield to waver. I wasn't sure if I was doing this for Keel, myself, or in the hopes that I hadn't sabotaged myself back to solitude.

In truth, the storage complex made me feel lighter too, whether it be the colourful doors that locked away people's treasures or just the knowledge that real human beings - not monsters - regularly walked these hallways. Until that moment, I didn't realize how much I missed people. Messy, fragile, wonderfully emotional humans. Nosferatu, for all their strengths and powers, really didn't compare.

When we reached Keel's unit, I hesitated at the door, wanting to enjoy my time out in the real world, where there was some small possibility of human contact - the meeting of eyes or brushing past someone in the corridor. A brief connection. A thread on which to pull, and remember. 

When I turned around, Keel was already inside, flipping on monitors, and making notes on a letter-sized pad of lined paper that lay beside the keyboard on the desk. He was so engrossed with what he was doing that he didn't seem to notice that I hadn't crossed the threshold yet.

I took one last long look at the hallway before stepping inside and closing the door.

"Was something concerning you out there?" he asked, but didn't turn his attention from his writing.

I now understood why he'd let me stand there. He thought I was looking for danger.

"No, I-" I had no idea how to explain my nostalgia for people and human things, so I didn't try. "It was nothing."