My Brother's Girlfriend

Chapter Eight

We sat on the back picnic table, eating the food that I had cooked up. My mother and Blake held their hands over the table like they usually did. Viper and Cecilia were holding hands across the table, and I sat next to Cecilia alone. Small talk was made and I continued to eat, ignoring everything directed towards me and shrugging of most of the questions. Cecilia being so close to me made me nervous, and all I could think about was her being so close to me and the way it felt when she touched my skin. 

"Hello, Earth to Vivian?" My brother snapped me back into it and I stared at him as he pointed towards Blake. 

"Yeah?" I asked. 

"I asked you what you want to do after high school."

"Well, I want to go to the New York Art Institute and get an education in sketching and graphic design." I took a long sip of my drink and Blake turned around to look at me better. 

"Why don't you get a career instead of a hobby?" I nearly choked on it and turned to look at Blake better too. 

"Excuse me?"

"You heard what I said." He seemed calm and that irritated me more, "I think you should work on getting a degree instead of bettering your hobbies." 

"It's not a hobby if you're talented in it."

"Exactly, do you see why you're wasting your time." I pushed up from the table and the chair slammed to the ground behind me. 

"Oh, so you'd rather I let what little talent I have wither and wilt so I can become a corporate ape and get a job I'll hate for the rest of my life?" I turned and headed inside but paused at the door, "Yeah. No thanks." I slammed the door and walked up the stairs to my room. I waited, and didn't hear anybody coming after me. I flopped down on my bed and cracked the window open. 

"Should I go check on her?" Mom asked.

"You can't baby her, she'll never learn." Blake countered. 

"I'm going to go check on her." She insisted.

"No, I'll go." I heard Viper say. I rolled over and waited for him to reach the door. A couple knocks on the door gave me warning.

"Go away." I muttered but he didn't. He kept knocking. "Go!" His fists continued to hit the door and I got up from bed and yanked the door open. Viper wasn't at the door, but Cecilia was. I shut my eyes for a minute and walked in sitting on the bed. I thought it was Viper and had prepared myself, but I had no idea what to do with Cecilia. 

"Are you alright?" She eased the door closed and it made me a bit nervous. I winced and turned over. 

"No, not really." I tried to make it clear that I didn't want conversation or company. 

"Well, do you want to talk about it?"

"What's there to talk about? You saw what happened." 

"Yeah, he seems like a real jerk." She got closer to the bed and I scooted to the far corner. She took that as making room for her and sat on the edge of it. 

"I hate him," I admitted, "if mom didn't love him, I'd force him out the door the way I did the others." 

"How do you know your mom loves him?" She asked curiously. 

"She looks at him the way she looked at dad." She froze for a minute, seeming to not know what to say. She quickly regained her thoughts, but it wasn't the same conversation as before. The prying attitude was gone, and she softened. 

"I'm sorry sweetie." The word seemed to do magical things to me. My skin pricked up, and I felt the need to touch her. I rolled over and looked at her instead, and she looked at me back. Her eyes were a comforting color, and her expression promised a bit of safety. 

"It's life." I whispered to keep my voice from cracking and making me look more weak. She scooted a little closer and I smiled at her as she smiled back at me. She ran her hand across my cheek and wiped away a tear I didn't realize had fallen.

"That doesn't make it fair, though." She tucked a stray hair behind my ear and I felt the warmth flood my body. She was flirting with me, a lot. However, I doubted she was seriously into me, it was probably for sport, or a test that Viper issued to test her loyalty or fuck with my mind. I tried to shove the idea that she was into me out of head when she laid her legs on the bed too. Her jeans hugged her nicely, and I couldn't help but look her over. She was gorgeous, with a body to boot. I swallowed hard, and realized how much spit had formed in my mouth. If it had been open, I would have been drooling. "What are you thinking about?" She whispered. 

"You." I said before realizing and pretended to cough, "You should get back to Viper." I tried to make it a smooth transition and she noticed that it sounded unnatural. Her smile was sly, and she leaned in closer to me.

"Is that what you want?" No. Every inch of me screamed no, but I knew what i had to say. 

"Yeah," I tried to sound strong, "I think that's what's best." 

"I didn't ask what was best," she got a bit closer, "I asked what you wanted." 

"I don't know what I want." I tried to make it sound strong, but it was weak and cracked. 

"Are you confused?" She got closer and I realized that I was and wasn't confused. I was confused as to if I was gay or not. I was confused as to why I was so bitter. I wasn't confused as to what I wanted, it was her. I wanted her, and I wanted her now. I cupped her into me a bit more and she smiled as I pulled her lips down to mine. I knew it was wrong, but I didn't want to stop. I kissed her hard, repeatedly. She kept my pace, and tilted my head back to get my lips better. A knock at the door sounded and she was instantly too far away from me for my liking. I fought the urge to groan and frowned instead. I threw my hands into my hair straightening it before my mother walked into the room. I wiped the smudge lip gloss and looked up at her. She smiled at Cecilia. 

"A minute with Vivian, please?" 

"Sure." She hurried from the room, whether from compliance or embarrassment I wasn't sure. 

"Now Vivian," my mother started in that firm voice that irritated me. I shut my eyes. 

"Go ahead, and take his side. I'm used to it by now." 

"I'm not going to take his side baby," she soothed me, "I sent him home. I apologized, and told him we'd go out for his birthday tomorrow instead. I came to be sure you were okay."

"I'm fine," I lied, "I just hope you see that I don't like him, and that's a good reason why." 

"I understand, I hope you'll forgive him eventually. I'm still marrying the man."

"Stop reminding me." I groaned now, and tucked the pillows and blankets around me. 

"I'm sorry my sweet," she kissed my head, "I love you. Goodnight."

"I love you too." She walked from my room and I was disappointed when Cecilia didn't come wandering back in. I thought about sharing my bed with her, and cuddling with her until the early morning. I rolled over and tried hard to dismiss the thoughts that came with my brother's girlfriend. She was probably just another one to him, but she was something else to me. I sighed, and tried to think happily before bed, but would most likely be drowning in nightmares before I knew it. 

"Fuck." I muttered into the darkness and just let it hang there.