THE ACTOR'S GUIDE: How to Become an Actor

-3.1: Audtioning 101: The Proper Auditioning Etiquette

Okay so you've finally got an audition and you don't know what the heck to do.

You're freaking out.

Your palms are sweating, your wig has flown to Africa, and your hair feels like noodle strings cause you haven't washed it in ten years.

I get you, my dude.

Let me walk you through it in this very stupid written skit by yours truly, Kyyyyy.

"Okay, I've got you an audition at 2392 Frog Road in Alacamera, United Cakes. Think you can make it?" Your agent says, scratching his head and circling over any casting calls in the newspaper.

To which you'll say: "Of course. I'll be there."

You'll already have your headshot that has been updated to look exactly like you do now (updated every 6 months unless you change something drastic like your hair color between then) and your resume complete with experience, training, skills, and information that nobody really cares about.

The audition is next week and you don't know what to do.

OH NO!

Let me run it.

So I see you got your headshot and resume.

CONGRATULATIONS!

but do you have a memorised contemporary comedic and dramatic monologue as well as a classic one, taken from the amazing words of Shakesphere or someone just as superior? Do you have a memorised commercial cause you never know what people expect these days? Do you have a solid colored t-shirt with no prints as to not distract from your face? What about your script memorised by heart with blocking and openings for the director to adjust it as they please? You got that playlist to set the mood, a snack for your teeth to mash on cause you're suddenly nervous even though you don't have to be? What about that drink for your parched throat. A highlighter, a note pad to take any notes necessary, a complete world built for your character that explains exactly who they are, where they come from and why? Did you brush your teeth so you can try to smile when you walk into the room. Did you bring a mind set for readjusting and that drastic cold reading?

If you got all of that, IT'S TIME TO BEGIN.

So you drive to the dang audition, you have a small back pack or a purse complete with your little "Acting Care Kit." You've got a monologue book in there, a notebook for note taking and tips from the director, highlighters, snacks and water, a stress reliever like a ball or a book if you're like me, a new playlist on your phone, or maybe the Good Vibes playlist on Spotify, the script, and YOUR HEADSHOT AND RESUME. I can not stress how important the last two are in your career.

You may have to sit in a waiting room, where a whole bunch of other people will be. Don't try to intimidate them. Smile. Let your positive energy flow to everyone in the room.

If someone part of the action vomes and asks for your headshot and resume, give it to them with a smile cause they can go and tattletale on you real quick. YOUR REPUTATION IS EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW.

And finally, your name is called.

"AJ ROPE!"

You're shaking your hands out, trying to gain your charisma and social skills, remembering that article you read about how to be more social and more of an extrovert. You go in there, YOU DON'T SHAKE THE CD'S HAND.

(They've probably been shaking hands all day. Keep your germs to yourself where they belong.)

And don't say your name or slate unless they fricking ask you too.

Smile, greet them, hey, maybe ask Sarah about her new wig cause it is looking lovely, compliment that very vibrant bow tie Nicholas is wearing, the painting in the back looks like a splatter of colors BUT HEY, that is quite a masterpiece you've got going on back there.

This isn't a time to be a kissup.

I'm pretty sure afyer a long day of seeing people come in and out, all these casting directors need is a nice person to tell them their awful yellow walls look like the most beautiful shade of pee you have ever seen.

(AGAIN. PLEASE DON'T TAKE ME SERIOUSLY. MY ALTER EGO MAKES A SHOW AND DESTROYS ME. I AM USUALLY NICE AND ONLY THINK LIKE THIS WHEN MY AUTHOR NATURE PEEKS ABOUT.)

So anyhow, you've did your complimenting, you've slated if they asked you to slate, you've pulled out your script just in case, AND YOU'RE READY TO GO.

SO GO.

DO YOUR THANG, STRUT YOUR STUFF, BE THE BOSS, MAKE THEM CRY, LAUGH, LEAN IN, BITE THEIR NAILS, SIGH IN HAPPINESS, MAKE THEM WANT YOU AS THIS PERSON.

And when you're done, tell them thank you cause they really didn't have to see your face today, walk out, not run, and just let it be.

If they tell you to cold read, don't loose it. THEY WANT TO SEE IF YOU WILL CRACK UNDER PRESSURE OR ACT WONKEY WHEN YOU MESS UP A LINE.

If you mess up, don't keep asking if you can start over.

"Can I start over?" Is like a code red when you have no other option and all hope is lost. "Can I start over?" Is your SOS, mkay?

If you mess up, don't acknowledge it, go back ONE line, and start from there.

Your reader may sound like Siri's long lost cousin from the Himilayers but THAT'S OKAY, react accordingly like you did to the walls at your house or your mama that really tried to get into it (and failed.)

If you get a call back, WOOOHOOOO LOOK AT YOU GO!

if not, don't take it personal babe. it's not you, it's them.

You're just not what they were looking for. That's fine. You may be what someone else is looking for.

And that's all I have for you in Audition Etiquette.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter AND IF YOU DID, leave a vote, comment, follow ya girl, and xoxo, i love, i love

<Kyyyyy 💘