The Last Vikings

#LiveLaughLove

"Microwaves," I said to Paulo.

"Microwaves?" he replied, looking at me like he'd just realised he'd let a lunatic out of the asylum.

I nodded. "Electromagnetic radiation. Microwaves. You know? From mobile phones."

Paulo frowned.

"Look, So you said you guys don't have full connectivity, right?"

He nodded. "Just satellite, a few hours a day."

"Which means the phone mast at the hotel—you must have seen it, when you came down, when I had hypothermia—is the first electromagnetic transmitter this far south, right?"

Paulo looked uncomfortable, and said, "Um, I suppose."

"Mobile phones work via electromagnetic radiation. You're a scientist, you must know this."

He side-eyed me defensively. "I'm a marine ecologist," he said. "It's not my field. Phil would probably know." He looked uncertain, obviously weird about bringing her up.

"Well it's true," I said. "3G, 4G, whatever, it's basically short-wave electromagnetic radiation. Microwaves. Which means when that mast went up at the hotel a few weeks ago, it will have changed the electromagnetic charge of the area. Maybe by enough to interfere with the whales' internal navigation systems, accounting for the change. The timing is right, isn't it?"

"A few weeks ago. Yeah." Paulo frowned at his screen and nodded. "Did you think of this just now?"

I nodded and he raised his eyebrows.

"Wow," he said. "That's pretty smart."

"Well, kind of," I said. "I read an article in the Ecologist last year about how phone mast radiation messes with the navigation of birds. That's what made me think of it. So whales could be the same, right?"

He nodded, chewing on his bottom lip. "Yeah," he said uncertainly, taking it all in.

"Look, I know it sounds kinda vaccines cause autism, but it's totally scientifically plausible."

What I didn't say was that I also suspected the radiation from the mast was somehow affecting people neurologically, driving them to snowy suicide.

That was less scientifically plausible—phone masts are everywhere in the modern world, after all, and we all carry on with our lives—but maybe if this was be a particularly strong signal because of the isolation, or if it interacted in some way with the electromagnetic charge of the Pole...

Whatever the mechanism, it made much more sense the mystery deaths weren't the nefarious plan of some powerful government, but an accidental result of the foolishness and hubris of humanity.

Just as we'd poisoned our planet with pesticides, destroyed the oceans with plastics and burned up the atmosphere with CFCs, perhaps we were now finding that the miracle of constant connectivity wasn't as benign as it initially appeared.

No war was more brutal than the one we waged on ourselves.

"We could ask Phil," Paulo said awkwardly. "This is more her area than mine. Though maybe it's better if I do it alone."