The Bad boy and the Biker chick

CHAPTER 1: Note the sarcasm....

"No! No! No! No!" I screamed as I walked into the small stable to which I had 'just' recently cleaned. "Why Seth?! Why would you do this to me?!" I refer to Seth who, being the devil horse he is, let out a loud snicker before trotting out of the now paint covered stable, with an amused prance.

I throw my hands in the air and let them land on my head in annoyance as I look over the mess that is now, the stable. "If you didn't want green then you could of said so!" I groan out, leaving Seth to look me over with a face full of grass whilst ignoring my statement. "Ugh! Why do I bother?"

With a heavy sigh, I find myself stumbling over the stable door before landing face first into the green, paint covered hay; just narrowly missing the still steaming pile of horse dung Seth had happily left me to clean.

"Ha! Seth do it again?" A husky voice who I recognised as Jake, called from behind me causing my cheeks to flame in embarrassment and anger.

"You think, asshole?" I said not bothering to move my face from the paint, making my words come out as a new foreign language that I had recently mastered, leaving Jake to raise and eyebrow in confusion.

"You know, I'm not gonna even ask what you just said." He sniggered. Jake knew that basically anything I said was either sarcasm, death threats or sometimes even both. I seemed to have a black belt in those two categories along with bitch, blonde and English vocabulary. He also knew first hand what I would have done to him if he were to argue or continue to speak about this incident that had happened more than once. From the silence, it was presumed that Jake had left me to my trouble and after making sure he was gone, I stood up; face and boobs covered in the puke green paint that was recently spilled. Knowing that if Jake was here to see the mess that covered me... I would never live down the undeniably nicknames and teasing that he was known for.

I tried to avoid people in the general area and the jocks (Jake and his gang of friends) where definately at the top of my list. It was as Cliche as it sounded, Jake was basically the schools 'gorgeous, jock, sex god guy' that no one, and I mean no one stood up to... except me. I had a brief demo of what they could do when I tipped the schools tofu onto Jakes head 'accidentally' after I tripped over Bridget's (the schools personal barbie, and her two minions) foot. Let's just say; after that experience I swore that I would never eat egg again. But even still, I had my own ways of getting back at them and as much as they tired, that one time was the last.

As for the gorgeous side of Jake, I find the mop of brown hair and the chocolate brown eyes, face chiseled by that of a god, a body basically made of brick and a smirk that literally left you a puddle on the floor; pretty much summed the meaning of gorgeousness, up.

With a shake of my head, I pick up the empty paint can and head back outside where the laughter of three barbie dolls erupted like a volcano on steroids, screaming in my ears in an un-holly manner. At this I closed my eyes slightly and muttered a few cuss words. With a small sigh, various comebacks and sarcastic remarks lining in my head, I slap a fake, icy smile on before turning towards the three girls who stood not to far away to face my doom.

"The looks an improvement, cat shit."

I wanted to scream my nasty remarks, slap the pout off her lips but instead of screaming and losing my temper like I usually would, I smiled and placed ice into my already ice sculpted glare.

"Aw, thanks Bridget! That's the nicest thing you could have ever said to me!" I outstretched my hands and before the one I call bleached Dorito (Bridget) could do anything, I engulfed her into a tight hug. With the sound of a sqeal, I step back to admire my work, watching as the two bleached pumpkins that hung around their all mighty barbie leader, screamed and jumped forty feet away from us in shock horror. "Yay! Now we have both improved! We should 'totally' be twins!" I said whilst I mustered the highest pitch for my voice before jumping up and down in fake joy.

"I'm going to kill you!" Bleached Dorito screamed with outstretched hands, but, like the cliche reality is... Seth came bounding into the picture in a flurry of black fur and a large ass, using his weight and surprise before pushing bleached Dorito into the puddle behind her that had Miraculously appeared behind her.

I stifled the laugh that threatened to get me into even more trouble, but failed horribly when it slipped out louder and harder than originally planned. After a while of tears, retarded clapping and drop, duck and roll; I managed to climb onto Seth's back, disappearing back to his stable.

~~*~~*~~

"Thanks Seth" I say as I stroke his large neck as I refered to the earlier incident before I walk to the end of the stable and begin to clean the eyes from earlier on. A few scoops of green hay later, the husky voice of Jake appeared in the stable door, leaving a groan to escape my lips.

"I got it all on camera" he laughed out.

"You better send that to me"  I say, scooping another pile of green hay into the barrel beside me.

"Already done" with that, my phone beeped of an incoming text. I scoffed as he smirked. Cue  the jerk.' "Oh, it's on youtube."

'Right on time' I think to myself.

"Ha! You've already got 300 views and I only put it up like three seconds ago!" He cried out in surprise.

I smiled, "show me". I gestured him to come in and Jake being the ass he is, forgot about Seth's dislike of men and kicked the salt lick rock into his crotch. I pressed stop on my recording phone and smirked down at him on the ground, holding his family jewels and squeaking out in pain. "How many times now Jake? Eight? Nine perhaps?" He shot me the finger and an icy glare.

"Oh look, your officially on youtube" I reported as the video finished downloading upon my phone. "And Facebook!" I reported as I stepped over to him, placing both my feet on either side of his torso. "Hey! I did you a favour!" I gestured down to his cupped hands. "Maybe that salt rock got rid of all those STD's you caught from bleached Dorito". That, earned me another glare.

I shrugged, stepping onto his stomach before getting off him and closing Seth's stable door. "Stop glaring! It gives you wrinkles!" I shot over my shoulder as I opened the door to my mums blaring car horn.

"You love my wrinkles!" He shot back as he steadied himself on Seth's stable door, earning him a carrot to the face.

"Yer! Just as much as I love Barney's fat ass!" I shot back, snickering as Seth tried to bite Jake again. Barney being, Barney the purple dinosaur, or Barney the fat donkey the stable yard owns for some unknown reason.

Mum was laughing, but still hitting me on the arm and cussing me about my swearing. I just rolled my eyes and mumbled, 'you should hear the words coming from your mouth when you drive'.