Letting it Go [It's a rant]

Stupidly Long Titles

Gather around dear readers! I just wanna say that I'm 13, and that all other 13 year olds don't apply to what I'll be saying right now. Now, onto the real, actual rant!

We've all seen them!

Hate them!

God help us!

I have a question for y'all. Have you seen a title that went somewhat like this: My Name Is Clara And I Am A Normal Teenage Girl Who Fell In Love With A Sparkly Vampire, But Somewhere In The Middle Of My Story This Werewolf Guy Kidnaps Me From My Super Hot Vampire Boyfriend.

-.- no. Just no.

By simply reading a title like that we all will know what the fuck your shitty story will start and end with! Yea yea, you all in love with a pale man who simmers and glimmers, you get kidnapped by another man who somehow is hairy and has a six pack at the same time, and yes, we know your fucking name is Clara.

But.

To.

Be.

Honest.

An don't give a fuck.

Once I see stories with super, über, stupidly long titles like that I will turn it down no matter HOW good the writing or HOW awesome the plot is.

If I find out that your  title is like that one above I will instantly drop the book. And so will a fuck load of other people.

My dear wattpadians, I'd like to shamefully point out that most people who committ this mistake are people around my age. Maybe ages ten to fifteen. I'm thirteen and take a glance at my books, the longest title there is four words. FOUR WORDS. If I ( I very lazy girl ) can make a decent title, I think you people my age can do so! I mean seriously, it's easier to type and not a drag. All my other titles are like what? Two or three words, heck a couple are a mere one! I don't wanna sound like I"m comparing, I just wanna say it's not that hard of a job.

C'mon, I bet you agree with me on that right?

Right?

RIGHT?

RIGHT?

Good * calms self down once again *

Some books can pull of the long titles simply because they don't give away the whole story or in a series. Here are some examples:

Percy Jackson: The Lightning Thief

Harry Potter and The Gauntlet of Fire

Hunger Games Catching Fire

See. They don't give away much of the plot. When I first saw the first Percy Jackson book I initially thought it was a guy named Percy and him being a thief that stole lightning. Welp, lets just say my accusations were wrong mkay. A good book has to have a good title, a good cover, a good blurb and a god damn awesome author!

Now. Before I blow a fuse and turn all green like the hulk, let me say calmly that it's possible to think of short, catchy and snappy title. Unless you have the gift that could make a really nice title like the ones mentioned above. No? Welp, then stick to easy ones okay.

Lesson for today: Don't over do it. Or I will personally track you down and show you how bad my hulk self can be. You can go ahead and ask my friends, pm me for all I care! I'll share you all my stories of how I'll go green and wrathful!