Depression | BTS Jimin

Chapter 2

"And you, Jimin?" All eyes turned to Jimin as he looked up at us all.

He opened his mouth as if he were to say something but then quickly closed it back.

The therapist waited patiently for Jimin's answer instead of pushing him.

The silence was so deafening inside this small empty room. We waited before he finally spoke up.

"Is forever an option?"

*

The therapy had seemed like it lasted forever when I'm reality it was about 3 hours. I couldn't even understand how this was supposed to help.

"Alright, therapy is at an end for the day. The next session will be tomorrow at 3:00. Please try your best to not be late." The therapist flashed a soft smile at everyone as he closed his notebook and took off his glasses.

Everyone stood up and started to gather anything that they had brought with them.

Jimin had gotten up and left almost immediately. I followed behind him as I made my way down the stairs and towards the door.

He pushed the door open and began walking down the road.

He walked here?

I walked out the door and started walking towards my mom who was already waiting in the car.

I opened the car door and sat down, closing the door after.

"So, how was it?" She turned to me and waited for my answer.

"It was shitty." I muttered under my breath.

"Do you understand now?" She asked me as she started to drive out of the parking lot.

I let out a sigh,"Understand what, mom?"

"That you don't really have depression."

"Are you fucking serious?" I was suddenly really angry at my mom.

"Depression isn't an act! I can't just fake having it!" I yelled loudly out of the sudden anger.

"Hani, you haven't always had depression! You need to stop acting like this!" Her voice got louder as she yelled at me and started to wave her hand in my face as she still watched the road.

"Depression isn't something you're born with!"

"Hani, you need to calm down!" She yelled even though she wanted me to calm down.

"I'm not going to calm down when you're telling me that I'm faking this!"

"Stop wasting your precious fucking money on me if I'm faking it!" I'm so sick of being accused of being a liar.

"How about I just kill myself! Maybe that would be better! Would you still call me a liar?" I was so angry that it slipped out of my mouth before I could even control what I was saying.

"Hani, you need to stop saying such things! You're acting like the victim!"

"You know what-" at the stop light I jumped out of the car.

I slammed the door and began walking down the sidewalk before she could say anything else to me.

My mom never understood me. She always told me how I was just acting like I was depressed just because before I was happy. She'd tell me about how much money she'd have to waste on me.

She wasn't helping my depression, she was making it worse.

I walked down the sidewalk until I reached a bench that was on the sidewalk.

No one was really walking past. It seemed like it was a very abandoned street. There weren't very many stores. There was a big neighborhood that was right in front of me though.

I decided that I should call my brother to come pick me up.

"Hello?" I heard from the other end of the phone.

"Jin, can you come pick me up?" I asked.

"Didn't mom pick you up?" He was confused as to why my mom didn't drive me home.

"She did.. but right now she's making everything worse."

"Okay, where are you?" And that's all it took for him to come pick me up.

I quickly told him where I was.

"I'll be there in 10 minutes." And then he hung up.

I let out a sigh and pulled the phone away from my ear and turned it off.

*

Jin pulled up in his car and waited for me to get in.

I opened the door and climbed in before shutting it behind me.

"How was therapy?" Jin asked sincerely as he started to drive towards our house.

"Why does everyone keep asking that?"

"Because I want to know how it went." He stated.

"It was shitty." I muttered as I leaned again the car door and looked out the window.

"Hani, you're feelings are completely valid. I'm sorry that mom makes you feel like they don't mattered.." he sighed.

Jin always cared a lot for my well being. He was always very protective of me and always looked out for me. It was nice. Especially since mom hates me for having my depression.

"Hani," Jin was trying to get my attention but I ignored him.

"Hani, please don't do anything to hurt yourself." He looked me right in the eyes as he stopped at the stop light.

I couldn't say anything to him. I couldn't tell him that I wouldn't. I couldn't lie to him. So, I remained silent.

I turned back around and looked out the window.

I didn't want to go back to therapy. I didn't see how it was supposed to help me at all. It just seemed like a waste of time and to me it seemed so stupid. I didn't want to be stuck there for 3 hours every single day. But my mom is forcing me. But not for my well-being. Just so I can see that I don't really have depression.

My mom will never understand me..

But my mind was drifting to the boy in therapy. The boy who said his depression had lasted for forever.

That boy stood out from the rest because of that answer. He looked so sad. Which saddened me more.

The same boy that I would see tomorrow.

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So many people were asking for this to be updated and I'm very sorry for not updating it! I was busy with other books and I kept putting it off for so long!

Please forgive me!💗