Kuroko no Basuke One-Shots

Aomine Daiki (Doom and Destruction)

FREAKING SATSUKI.

- A few days earlier -

"There's no way I'm putting on a bunny costume."

"Aw, please?" my best friend, Momoi Satsuki, pleaded. "It's only for the length of the school festival!"

"I don't care!"

"But I already bought the costume!"

"No! Buy a bunch of stuffed animals like any normal person would."

Our little quarrel was about me being her only prize for her booth at the upcoming school festival. She was planning to set up a basketball game for the booth she volunteered to run. I wasn't even remotely involved with the whole event until she asked for help. It was a bad idea to agree without asking what she needed help with first.

"Stuffed animals cost money. You don't," Satsuki defended herself.

"Oh, you know what? That's a good idea. I'll do it if you pay me 5000 yen," I schemed.

"What? But you agreed to help me!"

"That was before I knew you planned on making me go home with some stranger!"

Satsuki sighed, "But 5000 yen? Isn't that a little excessive?"

"Not when I'm being forced to dress up as a stuffed animal." We just walked into homeroom, still arguing as we sat down in our seats. Some of our classmates were looking at us like we were crazy. (We weren't really having your everyday disagreement.)

"But it's for a good cause! More people will play the game because they want to win you, which means it'll raise more money for the school's fundraiser." I should've been complimented by this, but I was more worried about other things.

"What'll happen when someone does win me, huh? You won't have any prizes left so people will lose interest in the game and all that potential money goes straight down the drain."

Satsuki lowered her voice down to a whisper and leaned closer to me. "I promise I'll rig the game so no one can win. I'll... I'll build a contraption that moves the basket or get a hoop with a small rim or something! You won't have to go home with anyone."

"You know what?" I said as the teacher began her lesson. "We'll talk about this later."

- Time Skip -

So, I caved.

I'm also wearing the bunny costume.

FREAKING SATSUKI.

We've been through so many love struck men (which, by the way, makes me even sicker with each person) trying to win me. Each one comes by thinking the game is just too easy; each one leaves thinking they should've brought more money with them. Even people running their own booths left their posts to come try and win me. (I'm pretty sure they were using money they earned from their games.) Satsuki earned so much money for the fundraiser that I'm surprised no one's given her a medal yet.

You see, I helped Satsuki rig her booth with a lever that inserts a clear panel over the hoop. She just pulls the lever before each person's turn and the ball bounces right out. No matter the level of skill, no one has been able to successfully make a basket. I'm sure everyone sees that it's rigged, but they still try for whatever reason.

At one point, when the customer count was low, Satsuki had me hold someone's hand while saying, "You can rub my fur for good luck if you'd like."

Oh, now I see why they keep coming back.

The bunny costume Satsuki has me wearing is actually kind of comfortable. It's a pink bunny kigurumi, accompanied by pink mittens and fluffy pink socks. It's the most pink I've worn in years, and it's the same color as Satsuki's hair. I wouldn't have put it on if it wasn't so soft to the touch after Satsuki took it out of the packaging. That's the only reason why I'm still standing here at this stupid basketball booth.