The Impossible Miss Blue

Saturday, November 15th

I hated when my brother and I fought. I knew that was what was coming as I drove home. I ended up staying at Luke’s with the rest of the boys on accident. We passed out while watching a movie. When I had woken up, I had 18 missed calls and 31 messages from my brother. I didn’t look through the messages. I didn’t want to see how mad he got. It’d just work me up even more.

I parked my car in the drive way and slowly got out. My phone buzzed and it was a text from Calum.

 

8:13 ‘You went home without telling us. :( It’s cool, tho. See you whenever x -CH’

 

I face-palmed. I forgot to wake them up and tell them. I even could have left a note or something. How rude of me…

When I walked into the house, it was deadly silent. Scary silent. I walked through the house, tiptoeing. If I could make it into my room in time— Never mind. My brother chest was blocking the view of my doorway. At the moment, I really, really hated that he was taller than me. My nervous blue eyes met his infuriated green ones. I took a small step back. “Alexis, where have you been?” He said sternly. His voice wavered as he tried to keep it at a normal level. “At some friends’ house.” I answered, quite simply, hoping that would be a good enough answer. I knew it wouldn’t.

“Friends? That stupid band from the other night? That doesn’t explain why you spent the night there!” His voice raised with every word. I could always tell when he was about to snap. It’d be soon, but this time, I didn’t care. “It is not a stupid band! They’re really talented guys and—” “Guys,” He said in a sarcastically calm voice. “So you spent the night with, like, 4 guys. Alexis, what the hell has been up with you lately?” He was shouting now. The mouse and lion comparison that writers use seemed accurate. He was the lion and I was the mouse… I hated the idea of that. “What the hell is wrong with me lately? Who do you think you are? You’ve been like this ever since Mum died! You started to act like a real brother and I always thought that was bullshit. You can’t tell me who I can’t and can see, or what I can’t and can do. I can decide for myself!” I was yelling as well. We both knew we hated this, and we both wanted to stop, but we needed to get it all out. “Just lay off!”

His eyes shifted to a darker shade of green. “You are just like Dad!” An uneasy silence fell over us as I stared at him with wide, teary eyes. We never talked about our father. After a few seconds, I inhaled a sharp breath and held tightly on to my side-bag. I still hadn’t taken it off since I had gotten home. “Maybe I am like Dad,” I said shakily. “Tell me if you can the resemblance as I leave you like he did to us!” I shouted as I walked out the door.I got in the car and drove. I drove until I was miles away. And I cried, and cried, and cried.

Then, when I was done crying, I realized I was in the middle of no where with no gas left in the car. I didn’t even have anywhere to go in the first place, so what was I thinking when driving out here? Leaving, my conscious told me. You were leaving.

I shook my head furiously and pulled out my phone. I dialed Luke’s number. No answer. I called Calum and it was the same. It repeated with Michael too, his voicemail being automatic. Maybe his phone died. I had only just met Ashton yesterday. It’s not very appropriate to show up on his doorstep asking to stay over while crying (since my eyes can’t stop).

“Hello? Lexi?” His voice came through the phone and I sighed of relief. “A-Ashton, could you c-come pick me up, please? No one e-else is… um, answering their phones and I need h-help.” I mentally cursed myself for stuttering. Even if it understandably appropriate, I never liked it. There was silence and I heard him shuffling around. 

“Where are you?” He asked. I heard a car door close in the back ground. “I don’t know, Ashton… I just, um, kept d-driving and I’m in the middle of no where.” I told him, looking around. Woods were on either side of the empty road and the sun was setting. I must have been here for hours. “Could you tell me what’s around you? I might know where you’re at.” 

“A creepily-old-looking shed that says, ‘ALLEN’ on is a little bit farther down the road.” I said just as I noticed. Ashton sucked in a breath. “I pass that road all the time to get to my mum’s house. Listen, it’s a dangerous road, okay? I don’t want you to panic, but lock your car doors and windows and if your headlights are on, turn them off.” He ordered. I did as he said. “Good?”

“G-Good.” I spoke quietly. 

I scooted down to under the dash board in my car and sat in a crouched position. He told me he’d send me a text when he was could see my car. I waited for about an hour, playing games on my phone as a distraction, but it was not helping.

When my phone made the alerting “ding” sound, I let out a sigh of relief. 

 

9:21 ‘I’m here, you can get out now x -AI’

 

I slid my phone in my back pocket as my heart rate slowed down to a normal pace. When I got out of the car, Ashton was already walking towards me with a concerned expression.

“Are you okay?” He asked and engulfed me in a hug. I tensed but after a moment, I wrapped my arms around his waist—quite awkwardly. “No—no, I’m not okay.” I sighed again, but this time, it got tangled with a small sob. His grip on my small frame tightened and I was thankful for the comfort. I really needed it. “You can stay at my place tonight and tell me what happened—if you want to, I mean.”

 

Ashton handed me a cup of Earl Grey tea as I had requested. He sat on one end of his leather black couch and I sat on other, wrapped in a thin blue blanket that matched my hair. It was almost 2 in the morning now. We had spent the last few hours getting a tow truck to get my car to a as station, then to Ashton’s place. 

I let out a small groan, tired of the silence that had been happening for a good 10 minutes. I think it was 10 minutes.

“My brother and I had a fight. But it wasn’t like a usual sibling fight. He, um, said that I was like my dad,” I sipped my tea with my shaking hand, not fancying having to recall the events. “We never talk about our dad; he became an alcoholic and left us. So when my brother said that I was like him…” I trailed off, sinking into the cushion of the couch. “You didn’t want to see him or talk to him or anything.” He finished for me. I only gave a short nod.

“It’s okay. Why don’t we watch a few movies, yeah? It’ll clear your mind. I suggest Disney—I’d like to admit that I have a PhD in Disney movies.” He rambled and I laughed a little.

Everything was seeming to be a little okay again. It was good.