Awoken (One Direction fanfiction)

Chapter 4

1 week.

1 nerve killing week.

It's been 1 whole week since the incident that happened with Harry. I haven't slept a full night just thinking that maybe, if I had not kicked that ball, my best friend would still be here today. I've never felt as guilty for anything like I do now in my life. I don't care how many times people tell me "It was an accident," "It wasn't your fault."

I was the one who kicked the ball.

I was the one who put my best friend in a coma.

Just the thought of that alone makes me completely mournful and for the second time in my entire life I cried. I mean I don't think I've ever cried this hard in my life. Tomorrow will be the first time I will see Harry at the hospital since the incident. I feel like I'm not ready, but at the same time I have to do this. I fell asleep home alone today. My mom left me a note stating that she is "busy" and probably won't be home until tomorrow night.

-

"NO! MOVE HARRY!" I woke up completely drenched in sweat. Lately I've been having these really horrible nightmares that leave me waking up gasping for air.

Yet it's the same nightmare every single time

I stand there in the middle of the field. The only thing I am capable of seeing is two boys playing soccer. As they become more visible I realize that it's Harry playing with another boy that I don't seem to know. But as I stare at him cautiously, I realize that it's me. I am basically staring at myself putting my best friend in a coma.

"Harry move!" I try to scream, but nothing seems to come out of my lips. I try to run to him, to possibly push him out of the way, but my feet seem cemented on the firm ground. I am forced to stare at myself hurt Harry every single time I fall into a deep sleep.

As I hold my knees to my chest, I stare at my alarm clock. The bright lights illuminating 5:00 am. I am suppose to be visiting Harry in about 4 hours from now.

Knowing that I wouldn't be able to fall asleep again, I quickly slipped out of my bed and tried to figure out what to do to occupy myself and kill time. As I turned on the television I was surprised to find out that they were giving a friends marathon. Harry and I used to watch this show all the time. Suddenly everything began to remind me of him and it was killing me. I fell asleep again being woken up by the continuous vibrations of my phone warning me that I've only got a few mintues before my appointment to see Harry starts.

I quickly got dressed and took a cup of coffee with me to relax me as I drove. I wasn't ready but i needed to do this.

-

As I walked the hallways of the freezing hospital, anxiety began building up in me as I slowly approached his room. As my warm fingers hooked over the cold door nob, I felt like running, like I didn't want to know what was coming. Although now there's no going back. I took a deep breath before opening the door and walking in.

The sunlight that flashed through the window made the room brighter than usual. I instantly spotted his curls. He laid in the hospital bed with oxygen plugs attached inside of his nose. As I took one good look at him I noticed something that I didn't before. He's changed. I mean he's physically changed.

His face and lips both became paler, and his body was getting weaker and skinnier. I tried to hold back my tears as I took in the sight before my eyes. I walked up to him despite the fact that he probably can't hear nor see me.

"I know you probably won't hear me, but I need to say this. It's all my fault you're here. You could be playing soccer with the rest of us right now laughing and having a great time, but instead you're here forced laying in this hospital bed for god knows how long. If i could take this all back I would" I swallowed the lump rising in my throat before I continued.

"But I just want you to know that I'm sorry, I am so sorry, even though I know an apology will not solve anything I just don't know any other way to show you how bad this is destroying me. I feel like I ruined you and I am just sorry for everything," I was just about to release my held back tears when the doctor walked into the room.

"Mr. Morris" he said as he cleared his throat. I nodded my head unable to speak at the moment.

"I have good and bad news" he said and I tensed.

"The good news is that there's a chance that you could keep Mr. Styles alive, but the bad news is that he might have to be hooked up to this machine for the rest of his life" he said emotionless.

I choked. For the rest of his life? Does this mean I will never be able to hear his voice again? I turned away from both the doctor and Harry's basically life less body. I held back everything refusing to break right now. I thought about it for a while, even after the doctor left. I sat in the couch for nearly 2 hours just staring at him breathing in and out at a slow steady pace just thinking. Should they just end his life? What if he was miraculously suppose to wake up the following day? Suddenly I couldn't think straight. So many thoughts clogged my mind and I just felt like falling asleep. I fell asleep to the sound of the heart monitor that beeped steadily to his heart beat.

For once I didn't have that horrid nightmare.

-

In the morning I decided that it would just be a good idea to skip school. I just didn't want to be reminded by every else about Harry. Though eventually I knew I had to get over this and face everyone. As I got into my car everything suddenly hit me. Reality just punched me in the face. I repeatedly banged my fists against my steering wheel until it accidentally honked, scaring a padestrian walking down the streets. I didn't care as I burried my head in my arms, and released this long dreadful sigh I didn't know I was holding.

When I came home I realized my mom wasn't home just as I suspected she wouldn't be. So I drifted into the only thing that I've been doing for the past few days to get away from everything.

Sleep.

-

Authors note:

Yes there are two people who co-write this story. We each write one chapter so the following one is going to be Emily.

Thank you guys for reading our story, we will try to update more often, but please it will really mean a lot if you guys would vote/comment your thoughts. Thanks

xx Michelle :-))