(Warning, a very touchy and sensitive topic is in this chapter, but it has to be written. I have no intentions to be inappropiate or rude.)
At least a week has past now and I am still trying to resist the urge to kiss the hell out of Kevin. It's getting easier though. I mean, I guess I'm slowly accepting that he doesn't like me back, and never will.
A deep sigh excaped me as I laid down in my bunk, staring straight in front of me.
Maybe I should try to just keep us as friends. We still haven't talked in a while and I feel quiet immature for acting like this. I can't help it though. He broke my heart into pieces, he can't simply expect me to tape it back up and got on with my life. He doesn't understand that what I felt -uh- feel about him is real and it is more than a simple crush. In his case, it was just lust. Easy to get over. I should try to be strong, and get over this sooner than later. C'mon Alix, you can do it. Infact, lets talk to him now. One week has been long enough.
I slowly got out of my bunk, and I ran my fingers through my hair. I took several deep breaths before leaving to approach Kevin, who was just outside on the tour bus, talking to some fans.
I won't bring up our relationship or anything. Just a simply conversation with him and the Ghosts.
I stopped a few steps away from the bus doors to ready myself for what I was about to subject myself to. I slowly opened the door and I was instantly greeted with 'Hello's' and 'How are you's'. I gave them all a small smile.
"I'm doing great, how about you guys?" There was good, greats, and even some excellents.
"I was just telling these guys about Alisters art and our upcoming album." Kevin informed me.
His familiar voice sent chills down my spine and I wanted to turn back into the bus, but I know it was far to late to do so.
"How are you liking the new album so far?" I asked them.
A girl with pink hair, dressed to resemble the Dreamer girl, was the first to speak. "I really, really, really like Under Wraps. By far my favourite so far."
"Same, I can't wait for next Tuesday for another song!" Another girl spoke up.
They continued asking us questions, and soon the group started getting smaller and smaller due to fans having to leave. Now, Kevin and I were left alone. I thought this was going well, but I realize it was only that way because there was others to distract me.
"Well that was fun talking to them." I said and Kevin nodded. I went to open the bus door, but Kevin put is arm in the way to stop it.
"We need to talk. You haven't said anything to me until now for a whole week and I need to let you know that this has to stop. I get it, this is harder on you than me, but still. We need to keep our band together and strong. I'm not letting something stupid as this get in th-"
I cut Kevin off, "Stupid? You fucking broke my heart! You know that I had feelings towards you, very strong one feelings. Then you come and say you do too, but then I find out that you only fucking wanted me for sex! I'm broke inside. You make everyday for me painful and agonizing! I'm done with it, but I stay for the band. Not for you, not even for me, but for the band and our promise to Manny. I came out here because I worked up the courage to talk to you, and to try to get over us, to try to become friends again so I can forget that this ever happened, but you had to bring this up and stir up my emotions. I am so done, okay?" I didn't intend on ranting like that, but I guess I popped like an emotional balloon and let that out. My eyes were now rimmed with tears, so I tried to blink them away. "I'm going to ask you to not bring 'us' up anymore. I can't be reminded of this pain you've given me. Thanks."
