[A/N: the magestic powers of procrastination and surprisingly being busyish strike again! So this chapter was like half written a couple weeks agooo... and half written in like less than an hour so yeah. Hope it's not to shitty..]
I spent the rest of last night next to Kevin as we drank hot chocolate and watched some films on Netflix on Kevins iPhone. He tried to keep asking me about what happened and if I remembered what the guy looked like, but I ignored the questions. Soon after a few movies ended, we fell asleep in his bunk. I had woken up in mine this morning, though.
I let out a deep sigh as I walked into the concert hall. I made my way to the empty stage and took a seat near the end, so half of my legs dangled over the edge.
I really want to forget all that has happened over the past while. It was getting easy to forget about the incident with Kevin, but he's getting close to me again. I don't want him to do the same thing again, which I'm afraid he'll do. Forgetting about the other night won't be easy, but it must be done. I can't be constantly reminded that I'm filthy and a worthless piece of trash that people can do whatever they please with.
Someone tapped my shoulder, and I turned to see Manny. He took a seat next to me.
"Wanna talk about what happened, yet?"
I didn't feel like reliving the moment by telling other what happened so I replied quietly with, "Ask Kevin."
Manny didn't say anything as he got up in a huff. He adjusted his hat over his dreads and said, "Aight."
He left me alone with my thoughts. First, I was thinking of how I wanted to forget, but it's seeming impossible with the constant reminders. Now I'm thinking about how I want to disappear. To just be gone, so I'd never have to remember any bad thing about my life. Although, I'd never remember any of the great parts.
I stood up slowly and stretched out my back. I got up and went to find my guitar to practice for the last concert we had at this hall. I began to practice for W.F.F. Sooner than later, practice came and went, as well with the concert. We packed up all our instruments onto our tour bus and we began to drive to the next city. It would be an overnight drive from where we are to where we are supposed to be, since loading took a bit longer than expected.
I lay back in my bunk, piercing my eyes closed trying to keep any thoughts from entering my mind so I could actually get rest. Soon I was drifting off, but constantly awoken by the muffled whispering of the other guys.
"Can you please shut up or something?" I hushed them.
A steady silence finally went over the bus and I thanked them before sleep finally took over.
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Here I lay on a bed with silk sheets, waiting for someone. Not just anyone, but rather it was Kevin.
He walked through the door that was across the bed. Kevin walked closer and got up onto the bed, kneeling over me. Both of us only seperated by the fabric of our boxer shorts.He kissed me rough, and I kissed back with the same amount of force. His hands placed on my chest, as one slowly started moving down to my erection.
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I woke up and jolted up, panting from a loss of breath. I glance down and I noticed that I had maybe enjoyed that dream a bit too much.
Getting up from my bunk and making my way to the shower, trying to be fast so no one notices me, was easier than I thought. I turned on the shower and waited a few seconds for it to get to the correct temperature before getting in it. Once in, I began to think about why I had that dream.
I acknowledge my attraction and love for Kevin, but I don't know why I had this dream. Sure, I miss Kevins touch, but why did my mind go straight for something so intimate? There is a chance I could have just been horny and that's what I craved most. Something I long for. Something to control my addiction for lusting after Kevin.
I stepped out of the shower and quickly dried my hair, and the nice beard I've got going on. I wrapped the towel around my waist because I've forgotten to bring clothes in with me.
Walking out of the bathroom and towards the bunks at this time was a terrible, but great decision.
