[A/N: ONFGFUOGBOI IM SO SO SO[A/N: ONFGFUOGBOI IM SO SO SO SORRY I HAVENT BEEN ON IN FOREVER BC A WHOLE BUNCH OF STUFF HAPPENED THE OTHER WEEK RESULTING IN ME NOT HAVING MY PHONE OR MUCH ACCESS TO MY LAPTOP BUT IM BACK NOW AFTER MORE PROCRASTINATION I NEED TO SToP Ok]
Minutes going by, feeling more like hours. I have given myself a headache contemplating as to going through with what I have planned. I'm currently the only one conscious on the tour bus as the Kevin and Manny had went out for some drinks, and Evan is sleeping like a log. I couldn't bring myself to going out, as I am scared that a certain situation would happen again due to my complete idiocy. I rock back and forth sitting on the bathroom tub, head in hands. I am scared and more anxious than I have been in ages. Thoughts pounding through my aching skull. Hands shaking, and everything feeling weak. My stomach has constantly been twisting in irreversible knots. I had the strongest sense of nausea, but nothing was coming up. Tears rolled down my face as I remember all the fault I've ever caused in anyone's lives. Thinking of all the pros and cons of my coping method, I realize that the cons outnumber the pros, but I'm strongly leaning towards it having more of a positive outcome, I mean, anything to relieve the pain, right? This decision is a large one, and I don't want to respond to hastily. I decided I'm going to wait a little bit, wait to see if things get better or only worse. I know this will be on the back of my mind, and I will constantly be thinking of it. That might be a good thing though, It can help me ultimately decide whether I'll go through it or not. I stood up and rubbed my ears, cursing outloud about how much I cry. I splashed cold water onto my face in hopes to reduce the puffy eyes I soon would have.
I tried to quietly leave the bathroom, for some reason thinking I had woke Evan up. I quickly glanced towards the bunks, he was still sleeping. I left the bus, going to the nearest bar, club, or pub. Any place that had alcohol, in hope of finding Kevin and Manny. After a few minutes of searching through a bar about five miles away from the bus, I found Manny, chatting with a woman dressed surprisingly modest. I walked up and asked the lady to excuse herself for a minute. She agreed and walked a bit astray to the dance floor.
"Where's Kevin?" I spoke loud to be heard over the floor shakingly loud bass, pondering why Manny was alone. Kevin wouldn't be off with another person, would he?
"He went to the bathroom, should be back soon. Take a seat, I'll get us a round of drinks." His voice was loud, but slurred.
Feeling relieved, I sat down like he requested and he ordered us a Sidecar, which is basically a mixture of whiskey and some other alcohol. The lady he was talking to came back and we all sat and drank, making some "deep" conversation on why cats being president would be a good idea. Well, Manny did most of the talking and his lady friend, name Cherise, just went along with it, nodding like we understood what he meant. Twenty minutes or so passed, and Kevin finally came back.
"Oh, hey Alix." He said as he took a seat, ordering a bit of brandy. "When did you get here?"
"Not sure, not so long ago." I said, downing my second Sidecar. "You know what? We should all dance, C'mon!" I stood up from my stool, and stumbled a bit as I pulled on Kevins arm. I got him out of his seat, and Manny and Cherise followed. We must have looked like the worst congo line ever. When we got onto the dance floor, it was like a sweaty field of grinding hormonal young adults. Kevin and I strayed from Manny and Cherise as we pulled eachother close. Our bodies having barely any space to move, rubbing slighting together.My arms losely drapped by Kevins neck, and his wrapped aronud my hips, one hand sliding lower than the other. Our foreheads resting upon the others. I moved my hand to run it through his hair. As he tilts his head, our noses bump into eachother before our lips collide. His kisses mixed with mine, creating a beautiful combination of lust and love. Our tongues joined together into a battle of dominince. Kevin leaving sloppy kisse from my mouth to my neck, kissing hard and leaving hickies. His passion left me craving more, and he could tell. He purposely buckled his hips into mine, making my half hard dick create more pressure in my jeans. He continued kissing my neck, hitting my weak spot everytime. Soft moans were slipping out in continuous, and unstoppable chains.
