Our Path of Freedom {HYYH, Wings, Love Yourself}

#3 Stigma. V

                   

It was the first fissure in the columns that had upheld my childhood which every individual must destroy before he can become himself. Such fissures and rents grow together again, heal and are forgotten. But in the most secret recesses they continue to live and bleed.

I went to the grocery store as I did nearly every day. It was a few meters away from my apartment near Seoul Station. My feet knew the way to carry me there automatically, even when my mind was off like it was nearly every day for a couple of years now. I never thought I would finally grow and become a responsible adult, have I been such a bad guy in the past. My life is better now yet it seems like something is still missing. My mind is not satisfied, craving for something I can't figure out what it is. I went into the grocery store. The same old man as every day was greeting me and I bowed down. Same procedure as always. But something was different this day. I wasn't alone. While grabbing together the stuff I needed I spotted a girl between the shelfs. She was really skinny...too skinny. Her hair reached till her shoulders and they were quite messy. Her backpack, in which she secretly packed stuff in the thought nobody would see her, and her clothes seemed worn out. The details of her face were so tender, she looked like a doll. She was the most beautiful girl I've ever seen...yet her face didn't show grace or light-heartedness. Her face spoke the language of pain, disappointment and fear. It was like a Deja-vu.

FLASHBACK

My name is Kim Taehyung and I am 22 years old. My parents kicked me out when I was only 16 because they found out I did drugs. It was only weed though and I only tried it once. I didn't like it. But they didn't care.

I became a loner on the streets. I slept in subway stations when I was able to hide from the security guards. Sometimes I also fell asleep under bridges, on park benches or in front of grocery stores. I started stealing from people. I robbed them. I felt guilty but what else could I do. I was just trying to survive.

One day when I was running away with a full bag of food I just had stolen from a grocery store, I bumped into a tall young man. He looked up and down my appearance with a thinking expression.

What's your name kid? His voice was so determining that I didn't even think about not answering him.

Kim Taehyung ahjussi. I stared at him in amazement. He seemed strong and dangerous but for some reason I didn't feel any fear at all. Maybe because I didn't have anything to lose.

The guy took me with him that day. He gave me a place to sleep, clothes and food. He gave me a life on one condition: I had to work for him. His people taught me how to be a better robber and soon I was one of the best in the business. I also met my best friend there. His name was Namjoon and we became like brothers. We loved to spray graffities together but only at abandoned areas.