Slowly. . . {DRARRY FANFIC}

Breaking. . . {Draco's POV}

He will never see me the way I see him.

Year after year I watch him from a distance.

Hoping, wanting him to look back at me.

To meet my eyes.

To fall in love with the real me.

But I've already fucked up so bad.

He hates me.

But I don't hate him.

I could never hate him.

I love him too much.

Every now and then I like to think of things if the situation was different.

But no.

I always come back.

I always remember just how much I've messed this up.

But that's on me.

Not him.

Not his idiotic friends.

Me.

Just me.

And my father.

If he would have just accepted me.

If he could love me...

I wouldn't be here.

I wouldn't have to come back.

I wouldn't have to face him again.

Harry Potter.

Saint Potter...

The person whom I love most in this forsaken world.

But he will never feel the same.

Why would he?

I'm a monster.

The curse I carry on my arm...

The blood on my hands.

I've nowhere to go.

I lost my friends.

My family.

Everything.

Except Harry.

As I watch from afar.

Why can't you see me.

Why can't you notice my pain?

Why won't you help me?

You help everyone else.

You're good like that.

Good...

I used to know that word. 

Now I just stand in mid battlefield.

Someone pull the trigger.

Shoot.

I can't help it...

If my every instinct screams death.

But I live.

So I can see his face again.

His eyes.

His smile.

And I think.

Of times where it could have been different.

Day by day...

Hour by hour...

My perfect world.