Trained to Kill Book 2: The Aftermath

five: waiting for her

I'm pacing around my room, speaking on the phone with Calvin. It's comforting, hearing about his very ordinary day, that seems so extraordinary to him. It's something normal. Something I can make sense of. I smile as he gushes over the scenery. "Oh, you're gonna love it here, Karm. You just have to give it a chance. It's the perfect mix of city and nature, just like you want."

I don't doubt for a second I wouldn't love it there. That I wouldn't love to move on from this horrible apartment in this horrible city where I'm constantly reminded of my horrible reality. "Well, I'm glad you like it babe. It sounds like you'll make a great fit. Are you ready for your meeting tomorrow?" I say shakily into the phone.

He's quiet for a minute. I hear a gasp, which I know by now means he has something to say but he doesn't want to say it. I really need to learn that mind reading thing from Jacob. "Karma. Talk to me." Calvin says in his serious voice, which I have always found very very sexy. It makes me miss him more.

"About?"

"Don't try to do that. I can hear it in your voice, something is wrong. Is everything okay down there?"

"Everything is fine." I say, trying to pep my voice up a little, though I know it won't convince him. And I know he won't be satisfied with my short answer either.

"Karm," He sighs heavily into the phone. "What is it? Why won't you talk to me? Is Jacob giving you problems, is that what it is? Because I swear to God-"

"No no no no Calvin, please. Everything is okay. I just miss you that's all." Which is mostly true. I miss him to death, that's the true part. The lying part is where everything is okay, but that hasn't been true since I woke up years ago. Is it still a lie if even I'm trying to believe it? At the mention of his name, Jacob's electricity sparks at the door and I roll my eyes. Does he insist on being such a creep? "Look, get some rest okay, you have a big day tomorrow. And I'm tired, so I'm just going to bed. Don't worry about me. I'll be better when you get back." I fake a yawn, which turns into a real yawn and then I realize I actually am tired.

Once I hang up the phone I try not to stomp towards my bedroom door, but I can't help but to swing it open angrily. "How come every time I try to talk to my boyfriend you magically show up, huh? Jealous much?" I stare at him, very aware of the fact that he's wearing pajama pants and absolutely no shirt whatsoever. Jesus Christ.

He waves the bottle in his hand. "I could feel you overthinking from all the way in my room, thought you might want some liquid relief." He smiles that annoying smirk of his. I roll my eyes.

"Letting you stay here was a mistake." I start to close the door but he stops it with his arm. I don't look at the way his muscles bulge out when he does, or how his expression changed from playful to that dark and sexy look of his.

"I'm just trying to be here for you Karma." He says in a low tone. "That's all."

"Why?"

"Because I understand." His eyes capture mine with a stare that I'm not sure can be described with words. I don't understand it, I don't know how its possible, but whenever we make eye contact something happens that transcends anything I've ever known. And I don't mean it in a sexy way, because everything Jacob does is sexy, as annoying as that is, but I mean it in a connecting way that goes much deeper than anything human. It's a true form of communication without communicating at all. It's nothing I've ever experienced.

He's definitely right in that I can't deny a connection between us. I'd be an idiot if I did. Wherever we were in our past life, before the memory loss, there was something. Now, the type of relationship we had, I can't be too sure about that. Who knows, maybe he was my adopted brother.