if you must mourn, don't do it alone (Jactavia)

Part 3, Chapter 1

"Bellamy will fix this," Octavia said for the sixth time, her resolution completely unwavering.

"You can't imagine that they're just going to let Bellamy walk right up and-," Kane is furious, but his exact fury is uncertain- Jasper thinks it could be at Jaha, it could be at himself, it could just be in general. Whatever it is, however, he is not calmed by Octavia.

Jasper agrees with Octavia, to a certain extent. He knows Bellamy would die trying rather than sit back and let his sister perish in the upcoming apocalypse, and that's precisely what Jasper's afraid of; that someone like Jaha will decide the sacrifice of Bellamy is well worth the safety of their survival.

"How can you be so calm in the face of such....such betrayal?" Indra demands, and she's been noticeably quiet since her first declaration.

"I know my brother. If he wasn't down there, which I'm sure he is, I would be," She frowns, "Unsure. But I have to believe he'll get that door open."

"I would banish them all for this," Indra said savagely, and Jasper sometimes forgets she is a hardened warrior, someone raised on blood and screaming, and right now it's hard to forget.

"Not everyone down there has to be bad, not everyone would have wanted this. It's why I chose to share, you know. The actions of the few should not excuse the death of the many." Octavia said, and this seemed to calm Indra, at least momentarily.

"These are sneaky people, Octavia. You must be careful with deciding who you place your trust in," She said, staring right at Jasper. He opened his mouth to comment, but Octavia was shaking with fury at her accusation.

"Don't you ever say something like that about Jasper again! Not only would he never hurt me, he is just as much part of Skaikru as I am- to say not at all!" She bared her teeth.

"Kinda hard to want to be part of a society that sent you down to die," Jasper agreed blithely, then frowned, "Why aren't you saying that to Kane, huh? He's still part of that group." Jasper waved a hand. He didn't hate Kane, nor like him. He respected who he'd become, but obviously, he still had major problems with him.

"Look, I'm out here, aren't I?" Kane said, shaking his head, "If I had been in there, know this would not have happened. It's probably why I'm not."

"I trust him," Indra replied to Jasper's question, "Hesitantly, right now."

"Oh, Indra...I forgot...these are for you." Octavia shifts cautiously, pulling out a pair of two daggers. They're nice daggers, Jasper can see, but he doesn't understand the significance of them. Indra does, for immediately, she looks like she's about to cry, or at least, looks extremely sad.

"I took them off Fio. Roan killed him. I don't know if I could have," Octavia whispered.

"You would because you are a warrior and you would have done what you had to," Indra says, "And I could not have been mad at you."

"Fio was your..." Kane questioned, trailing off.

"It is hard to describe. We have a word in our language, but it doesn't quite translate to anything in English. He was...a dear friend. He was my battle partner. He was someone I could always talk to." She paused for a long moment, staring down at the blood-covered blades, "He was Gaia's father."

"Oh," Kane blinked, "So you two were...something?"

"Not so." Indra shook her head, "I wanted a child, he was someone I felt would pass on good genes. And, I trusted him. Gaia does not know. I might tell her now, however."

"Didn't she ask? Didn't she wonder?" Octavia asked in a small voice, and sometimes Jasper forgot that she too didn't know who her father had been.

"In our culture, no one questioned it. A mother is the most well-respected position one can have. She is a true warrior. While most of our Hedas are young, those that get the chance to become mothers while or before are especially revered, since a mother knows what it feels like to experience true pain and true sacrifice. The Heda is thought to be a mother of everyone, but not all understand it. No one questions a mother's choice to keep a father a secret, since, they aren't as respected anyway," Indra smirked, "I imagine very different from your own society."