YouTube ➸ Larry Stylinson

34 - Treatment

When Harry finally gets home, after various scratching incidents at stoplights, Louis runs out of the house.

"When the hell did you get a motorcycle?" Louis asks, frantically.

"I rented it."

"Oh. Well, I did some research." Louis pauses. "Humans can't really have fleas. They can get bitten by fleas, but yeah. There's only one species of flea that live on humans and they're called—"

"Pulex irritans. I know, the vet told me." Harry sighs. "Nonetheless, out of all the fleas that kitten could have had, she had the one species that can live on humans."

"Speaking of the cat, where is it?"

"I left her with someone."

"Did you tell them about the fleas?"

"Uh, no." Harry says, sheepishly.

"Harry! You're going to give everyone fleas! The helmet you're wearing, the person you left the cat with, the exterminator, even." Louis scolds.

"Well, let's use this shampoo and get these things out of my hair." Harry takes the bottle out of his bag.

"About that," Louis smirks. "I'm recording it. Because, I need a daily vlog, and nothing is better today than this."

"No! Absolutely not." Harry frowns.

"Too bad, babe." Louis gestures his boyfriend to the backyard, not touching him, of course. There, there's a tripod and a camera set up, and a hose that lays on the ground a few metres away.

Louis turns to the camera, and presses record. "Hello, my people! I have a nice surprise for you guys, today. Harry quite possibly has obtained fleas from a stray cat he found, and we're going to wash him off with this hose." Louis whips the hose around in his hand.

"Hi." Harry waves awkwardly at the camera.

"Strip, white boy!" Louis yells, and Harry raises an eyebrow before smiling cheekily and pulling his shirt off over his head. 

Then, his pants go. After he takes off his socks, he's left only in some tight white briefs. 

"Damn, Styles." Louis mumbles while observing Harry, before turning on the hose. He points the hose at the ground, and then he looks at Harry's ankles. They are red and swollen, evidence of flea bites. "That looks like it hurts, babe."

"Itches like hell." Harry pauses and looks at the camera. "Does hell itch?"

Louis shakes his head, and sprays Harry with the hose. He lets out a totally manly shriek as the cold water hits his skin. He wasn't expecting it. 

Louis is doubled over in laughter, but he continues to aim the hose at his beloved boy. Soon, Harry is soaked through and through, so Louis picks up the shampoo bottle. 

"It says to apply liberally!" Louis tells Harry as he tosses him the bottle. 

Harry takes it and squirts it directly onto the top of his head. Then he rubs it in, until his head looks like a giant white mass of bubbles. 

"Ready?" Louis asks, winking at the camera. While Harry had been busy with the shampoo, Louis filled a giant bucket with the hose water (and perhaps he dumped a bunch of ice cubes in it, as well?). Louis struggles to carry the bucket, but within ten seconds he's behind Harry, tipping the bucket onto his head. 

"OH MY GOD THAT'S COLD!" Harry yells, running away from Louis. The latter picks the hose back up and chases Harry around with it, until it pulls taut and Louis can run no further. 

"Come back, baby!" Louis shouts to Harry, who is still only in underwear, which are indeed white, and wet. Meaning, they're practically see-through. 

Harry turns around, realizing what he's wearing. He quickly runs back into the safety of his own yard, only to, once again, be sprayed by Louis. 

"Okay, okay! Enough hose water!" Harry pleads, and, being the person Louis is, he sprays Harry a little bit longer before shutting the hose off. 

Harry walks over to Louis, and the camera. "I hate you." he says.

"You love me and my fans." Louis notes.

"Your fans, sure. But I'm not sure about you, Tomlinson." Harry slits his eyes at Louis and then grabs a towel, which had placed on a lawn chair previously. He shakes out his hair like a dog before drying off. While Harry's doing this, Louis ends the video. 

"I'm gonna go upload this. You come inside when you're dry. There's more stuff we need to do to your hair and skin."

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An hour later, Harry finds himself laying in bed with his legs covered in calamine lotion and ice packs, his hair soaking in some baking-soda and water mixture, and his arms being held down so that he doesn't scratch himself.

"This isn't comfortable." Harry whines, shifting around.

"You're the one who had to pick up that cat."

"I couldn't just leave her!"

"You could've." Louis states.

"Whatever." Harry huffs, closing his eyes. 

They sit in silence for awhile, until Louis gets his phone out. He scrolls through some comments on his newest video, the one where he helped bathe Harry.

"Haz?"

"Hm?"

"My fans love your underwear," he pauses. "or perhaps they love what they can see through your underwear."

Louis can't see the blush that spreads across Harry's cheeks, but he can sense it. 

"Um." is all Harry can muster, and they again are enveloped in silence.

After a few minutes, Harry speaks up. "Even though you're a total dick—"

"You are what you eat." Louis cuts in, then breaks out laughing so hard that Harry thinks he will die. 

"Lou! As I was saying," Harry glared at Louis through the dark of the room. "even though you're a total dick and you are rude and sassy and mean, I love you. I don't really understand why I love a man that takes videos of me being practically water tortured and then posts it for the whole world to see, but I do." 

"Aw, you sap." Louis smiles. "I love you, even though you just called me all those names." he pauses. "But I'll admit, I like being called names." he smirks.

"Oh, ew. I'm not going to call you names when we're..."

"When we're what, Harold?"

"When we're... uh, eating cucumbers."

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so i researched fleas for you guys since so many of you said humans can't have fleas.... i found a species of flea that humans can have!! hA take that (i still love you)

[edited]