Red Alert Romance (Sequel Tip Toe Romance A Dan Howell/Danisnotonfire Fan Fic)

Drunk on a plane

So this uhh chapter is about Sam and Phil's Honey moon. I warn you it will be graphic. I did not enjoy writing this, nor did I want to but I figured y'all wanted some Sam and Phil action.

So on we go...

Drunk on a plane

(ELIZA)

Dan was talking to Phil on the phone. Phil was on speaker but didn't want me to hear anything just in case Sam walked out or he brought up something that might make me hurl. I've stifled hurling only once, and that was Dan's fault. Which I will punch him later for.

Phil laughed, "And then she got drunk on the plane-" Wait Sam got drunk? He must be kidding. Sam has never been drunk. And she got drunk on a plane. "It was hilarious because she was trying to kiss me every five seconds right in front of this guy who got rejected from his date offer. Plus, she was laughing at everything I said and I had to stop her before she unbuckled herself and started dancing like a crazy freak."

Dan laughed, yup that was a drunk Sam I imagine dancing like a crazy freak. But on a plane!? "Wow, she was drunk." He spoke and I gave him a face which I hope came across as 'No shit Sherlock.'.

"Yeah and then we get to the hotel," Oh no please don't describe the sex. Please it's between my brother and my best friend, now sister-in-law.

"Oh no." Dan said glancing at me.

"Turns out the room we rented has an alcohol cabinet. It has whiskey, wine, champaign,scotch anything you can imagine they have it!" Phil said excitedly, I felt vomit crawling up my throat. "Long story short, now Sam's totally wasted. Like she's not crazy dancing anymore I have yet to actually talk to her. She just grabbed a bottle of Chardonnay, and started pouring two glasses. I'm drinking mine right now but Sam she drowned ten." He took a deep breath. "Anyway we called, or I did because she's taking a shower I don't know why but she is, anyhow we made it here safe-"

"Phil babe why are you on the phone during our honeymoon?" A clearly wasted Sam asked. That did not sound like Sam. At all. Obviously we were on speaker and she just ignored it acting like it wasn't there.

"I was calling Dan and telling him we made it here safe. Right Dan?" Phil said as I heard the sounds of kissing come through the phone.

"Right mate." Dan replied glancing back at me and wiggling his eyebrows. I think I'm definitely going to throw up now.

"Sorry Phil's a little busy right now, it will be a we'll call you sort of thing. Bye Dan." Sam said clearly wasted. I pretended to vomit as the line went dead.

"I can't even imagine what they're doing." I said sitting on the couch.

"They're probably having hot sex on the patio, shower, or bed if they get there in time-"

"DAN!" I yelled interrupting him."It's my best friend and brother! Do you not know how creepy and weird that is!?"

He smirked as he sat down next to me.

"I bet they have music too, good lord let's hope they have-"

I punched Dan in the arm. "Don't even start it."

"I mean someone could just-"

"Dan."

"I mean seriously they could just leave their jeans on-"

"Dan." I said interrupting more angrily this time.

"Or unless she bought a lingerie-"

"Dan." I said making him finally stop. "Shut the fuck up."

"Speaking of fuck..."

"Dan I'm going to bloody kill you!" I yelled tackling him.

(SAM)

I knew I was totally wasted. That was for sure. But I mean who wouldn't be it's our honeymoon! We both want to have fun so I figured I'd get drunk to take off the edge.

I got off of Phil's lap and walked into the hotel, he'd just been on the phone with Dan sitting out on this patio with a pool. Phil smiled when I glanced back at him as he stood up. I smiled as he closed the sliding glass door. I tossed his phone on the bed in our bedroom.

I leaned up against the door which had a mirror attached to it. "Phil you'll have to go get your phone if you really really want it back." That's not something normal Sam would say or do.

"Well," He sighed grabbing my hand. "I think I need some help."

I bit my lip, "Really?"

"Yes, do you know how hard it is to grab your phone?" He smirked.

He grabbed his phone and set it on the bedside table. I sat down on the bed, "Well now that we've accomplished that what do you want to do?" I sighed.

He tackled me to the bed, slowly, then whispered in my ear. "It is our honeymoon, love."

(A/N DID NOT WANT TO WRITE THIS!)

I smiled just as his hand slipped up my shirt and then back around to my bra latch. He did this all whilst kissing me, my neck, my lips, my face. I kissed him back as he pulled off my shirt, I grabbed the base of his a simple white shirt with a triangle on it. I slowly pulled his shirt up, revealing his pale skin that was so attractive to me.

His hands roamed to the waistband of my jeans and slowly did he unbutton them then slowly unzip them. I figured I should probably leave his on considering right now in this moment I was only wearing two undergarments.

"I love you." He said breaking our kiss to take off my skinny jeans. One undergarment left.

"I love you too, Phillip."

@Girlwithcoolredhair I think this is why you didn't want to finish the book. Grrrr....

Anyway uhm sorry I about barfed literally because I just- let's just say health sucked for me. :) I hope if you wanted Pham action, you got it and enjoyed it. Because...nevermind! Bye!