Self depreciating poems about a real girl with emotional problems.

Cutouts

I can never be good enough
My feelings are all out of wack.
I'm going back to how I was
When I thought I couldn't go back.
I'm setting myself up for disappointment
Just so I can crawl right back.
I don't wanna die again
I don't wanna be set free.
I want to be perfect
But I wanna be me.
I don't understand my feelings
They make no sense.
I don't get why I have to be like this.
Why can't I be normal?
And do normal things.
Why can't I just ride a bike
Instead of thinking of myself swinging.
Off a tree and down the hatch
My happiness goes down the drain.
I don't want these emotions again
I just don't wanna cry.
I'm loosing myself day by day
And I don't know what's right.
Nothing in my life goes good for me
I just wanna feel alright.
My friends all hate me
And I'm annoying as crap.
They all just feel bad for me
That's why I always get slapped.
I'm thankful for my friends
But at the same time I'm not.
Because they're the reason I get happy
But they're also the reason I'm Not.
My life is just twisted right now
And everything just hurts.
I don't understand this reasoning
I wish this came with a book.
I can't stand my body image
I wish I was more comfortable.
I want life to go back to normal
But I want myself to grow.
I think to much of my future
But not enough about my show.
I don't understand my brain
And I don't like it.
I just wanna be better
Not my old self.

                        -Mythical_Author