No One Else

Chapter 5

5

Elle

"We cannot buy this house."

"You had to know it was going to be expensive. We're in London, Elle."

"I knew it was going to be expensive, but I didn't think it was going to be this expensive."

"Elle it's—"

"It's just under two million pounds. That's over two and a half million dollars." Saying the number out loud made my head spin, and I stuck it in my hands in an attempt to grasp reality. "We are not spending that much money on a house."

He began gesturing with his hands, but I kept my eyes cast down at the paperwork between us. "Elle, I'm sorry I kept Ben from listing the prices when he sent them to us, but I knew that you wouldn't be interested in looking at any of them if you knew the cost."

"This is a bad idea. We're rushing things and this is a bad idea." I looked up at him, shaking my head.

Jude's mouth opened and closed, clearly wanting to say something, but not knowing what; we'd suddenly found ourselves spiraling out of control. After nearly a minute of silence, he got the words out. "How much do you think I paid for my current house?"

"I have no idea. I can tell you though that a number like this would have never crossed my mind."

He leaned forward, took hold of my hands, and pulled them so they rested in his between us. "I had Ben appraise it last week; it'll easily go for anywhere between 1.5 and 1.7. I paid for that place outright, which means every cent I make in return can go towards our new home. If you think of it like that, this place is less than 200,000."

"Maybe..." He was going to hate what I was about to say. "Maybe you should buy it, Jude."

His brows came together. "No, Elle. We're supposed to do this together."

"There's no way with my salary on the table the bank is going to give us enough of loan to purchase it. You should just buy it, and then I can give you money every month, as if I were paying part of the mortgage."

"Are you out of your fucking mind?" His dark eyes grew wide as his head jutted forward. "I'll not have you paying me rent for the home we're building together. I've already called the bank; my income is enough to get us more than we'd ever need to get this house."

But as I put the pieces together, it just didn't make sense to take out a mortgage on something he could easily own, and my head shook back and forth. "You need to buy it, and I need to feel like I'm contributing. If we take out a mortgage, then we're paying back interest that doesn't need to be paid if you can purchase it with the money you make from selling your current place."

His lips pursed together and he looked down at the papers. He knew I was right; he knew it didn't make sense for us to be paying more than we needed to for something if he could pay it off all at once. But there was something more I needed to say. Rip the bandaid off.

"Jude?"

"Yes, love?" There was the edge of defeat in his voice.

"I...we have to be honest with each other. Even when it's hard. I'd be lying to you if I said I had no reservations about this. Sure, when we were touring the house this afternoon, it was wonderful and I could see us living there for years and years to come, but there's a small hesitation in me. Don't, please don't get mad," I softened my eyes, hoping beyond hope for him to understand, "but, what if this...what if we don't figure this out? I...I would rather us not have to fight over the house and finances should we, well, go our separate ways."