I Fell For Him|| TBJZL FF||

28 - Home

Alana's POV
It's been 2 weeks now, and they are finally letting me out. Tobi has brought me some clothes to change into and I was up and out of there. To be completely honest with you, I was scared. I walked along side Tobi to his car and he drove me back to the house. I walked in and was so happy to be back, although this feeling deep inside of me was so scared. I walked through the house, getting used to its surroundings again. I walked to Simon's room and knocked on the door and walked in, he looked up and smiled, "welcome home Em" he said, I smiled and sat beside him and leant my head on his shoulder, "you Alright" he asked, I sighed. "I dunno" is all that came out. I knew very well I wasn't I just didn't want to admit it he wrapped his arms around me, "I'm here to talk Em. I'm always here" he said to me, I leant my head on his shoulder, a tear rolled down my face and I wiped it quickly before Simon saw. I stood up and walked to the door, Simon looked at me with raised eyebrows, I smiled slightly and walked off. I went to my room and closed the door and sat on my bed. I looked around my room and saw my camera lying on my desk, a light layer of dust on it. A sigh fell from my mouth, realising I had to let my viewers know I'm alright. I got up and walked to my chair and set up my camera, I stared at myself in th view finder, seeing the cuts over my face. I couldn't do it, not today.

I stood up and walked out of my room, the walls seemed to confine me, I knew Tobi was busy so I walked over to Josh's room and knocked, the door opened and Josh smiled, "hey Em, you Alright" he asked, I sighed shaking my head, I looked down refusing to let the tears fall. He lifted my chin up, "Josh, can we go for a walk I don't care where, I just need to get out" I said to him, he nodded and grabbed his keys and shoes. We got outside and I tried to slow my breathing down, "Ema, talk to me" He said, "the walls, they felt like they were getting closer and closer" I choked out, a soft sigh fell from his mouth. "What did he do to you" he asked as we walked. I let out a shaky breath, "things that I don't want you to know, things I wish I could forget" I said to him, another sigh came out and we walked in silence for a while. "You said the walls seemed to get closer, are you claustrophobic?" He asked, I shook my head, "I've never been scared of that, it just happened all of a sudden, in the hallway" I said to him, he stopped and looked at me, "how small was that room" he asked, I thought for a second, "2 by 3, maybe not even" I said to him, he placed his hands on my shoulders and brought me into a hug, neither of us said anything we just stood there. He pulled away, "are you alright to head back?" He asked, I nodded.

We arrived back at the house and I walked inside, letting out a deep breath, trying not to think about anything. I walked to Tobi's room and knocked on the door. I stood in the hallway, my breath slightly quickening, the door opened and Tobi looked at me worriedly. "You Alright?" He asked, I nodded and walked in. I laid on his bed and closed my eyes, trying not to let the tears fall, "Em" Tobi said softly, I opened my eyes, a tear rolled down my cheek. "What's wrong baby" he asked softly as he wrapped his arms around me. I couldn't speak, all I could do was cry and let out shaky breaths and loud sobs. He rubbed my arm as I cried onto his shoulder. All I could do was cry. I was an actual mess. I don't know how long I was there for, but I cried until I could no more. I looked up at him and he wiped a tear from my cheek. He didn't say anything, he just hugged me once again. "I can't do this" I whispered to him, he looked at me, "can't do what" he asked, "I'm scared all the time now, at the hospital and now here. I can't pretend I'm okay, because I'm really not" I said to him, my voice breaking. He squeezed me tighter, "baby, I'm here to help you, all the boys are. We will make sure you're okay. Just talk to us" he said kissing the top of my head. I sighed slightly, "I know Tobs, I just struggle to get some confidence to tell you my problems. Every single one of you. I've always bottled it all up" I said to him. He squeezed my hand slightly and we sat in silence, him holding me tight as I let more tears fall