My red string.

Chapter 5: Neglected.

HER
A few days ago I received a letter from Nathan. Since that day, I have read it like a thousand times and I'm still in shocked. I never thought things could end up being like this. I just wanted some time, I needed to clear up my mind but Nathan was my bf apart from my feelings. I didn't want to lose him. It was more than incredible to me that we were living this. I couldn't stop thinking about him, even I started dream of him. How angry could he be. Even though I didn't cry, I felt so bad deep inside like empty. And the worse part is that we were so away that I couldn't do anything. I felt so pointless, without my other part.
I stopped focusing on school, I was like in another planet. All I could think of was him. What should I do? He blocked from all social media, I couldn't even send him a text or something. He didn't want to know nothing from me for sure.

HIM
Of course I felt sad about the situation with Nicole. She didn't even reply but lest be honest I wrote it with the intention of no having a reply back. Even though, I guess I was feeling better. I needed for me. I started hanging with more people and my performance on school was getting better too. I was satisfied because I was enjoying more living this experience. It was my time.

Spring break was coming close and a groups of friends of mine and I started to plan a trip for those vacations. They wanted to show me the amazing Australian beaches. I was excited.
I remember that in these holidays, Nicole and I used to take advantage of vacations and always searched a place where we could surf. I miss our time together. I miss her.

HER
The first months were hard for me, I thought I had my mind cleared up, I met Chad and things were going fine or I that was what I thought. I searched help on my friends, they gave their advices and their support and that help a lot. And even I was feeling sad and it was a difficult time for me, Chad was there for me, every time that I needed him. He knew everything of course, I told him all about Nathan. He was so understanding and I appreciated that a lot. For all of this, I was feeling better. But deep inside, I was suffering. I wanted to stop thinking about him but even when I didn't notice I was thinking about him. How could he be, I hopped that everything was going okey, that he was enjoying everything. He deserves to be the most happy person in this planet.

HIM
The other afternoon I was doing FaceTime with my parents. I was telling them my plans for spring break and how life was going. Seeing them on the screen of my lap comforted me and the fact of missing them. Once we were almost going to cut the call, they asked about Nicole. My mom and her mom have been friends since we started hanging so I guess they were still in contact. I didn't tell them what was happening because I knew that they would felt a bit sad because they love Nicole. But well I had to tell them about everything. They were surprised for the letter that I sent her but they kind of understood or that is what they made me believe. They said that Nicole's mom told them the other day that they noticed that Nicole was acting super weird and sad and she was worried about it because she never wanted to talk so she asked my parents to please tell about it and perhaps I would've known. I felt bad about it, not knowing nothing about her, if she was doing fine or bad. She needed me and I wasn't there. I was missing her more and more everyday, again. My parents told me that I should try to talk with her but I didn't know if that was the right thing to do. Maybe I hurt her a lot, maybe she hates me now.