Uchiha VS Uchiha

Chapter 3

AN: I experimented with writing from the author's POV (tried! I am not a professional) to see if things flowed better this way. Let me know if you prefer it from this perspective.

Just a gentle reminder that characters are written OOC and does not follow everything from both the Naruto and Boruto series. There will be lemons in the near future so if you don't like that kinda thing then....you know.....

This chapter is rated M for adult content and lots of swearing and references to drug use.

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Uzumaki House

1 week later

A very irate Hokage of the hidden leaf village was casting dirty looks to his smug looking son as they ate their breakfast.

Shoveling eggs in his mouth, his glare intensified as he recalled every little trick his son and his gang of friends (including his innocent Sarada) has been pulling on him.

He knows people thinks he's and idiot but he didn't win the title of Hokage off a poker match! Uzumaki Naruto was a brilliant dumb person and he would be damned if he didn't get to fuck his wife today!

Just yesterday, Boruto had a stomach ache, claimed he didn't dodge Sarada's chakra enhanced punch quick enough. Yeah right! Whining like a princess into to wee hours of the morning; by the time Hinata came to bed, she was too tired to do the naughty dance with me! He thought angrily as he gulped his juice.

All fucking week has been the same! By Wednesday he realised that it was utter bullshit. All the unused semen must have boosted his brain juices because no way in hell can Boruto consecutively keep me away from his mom that efficiently.

He put two and two together and got his answer. Sarada.

Let's face it, my son is a smart idiot just like me so the brains of this sick operation is none other than my little princess Sarada.

Why Sarada why? Naruto thought as he washed the dishes having finished eaten his breakfast. He decided to clean up before he left so Hinata could get some more rest. She has some catching up to do, he thought as he scrubbed a pot.

Why would anyone want to do something so, so monumentally FUCKED Up like this? This is the most twisted prank ever existed, why would they suddenly decide to prevent me from sleeping with my wife? By all accounts, it's makes no sense.

Maybe I should talk to the teme about this, it's his kid behind this, I just know it. She's the daughter of not one but two legendary sannin, and one of them has a massive brain behind a large forehead.

Walking along the street, grumbling to himself about the perils of reproduction, the blonde Hokage spots the pineapple spiked head of his chief advisor and friend stomping along the road as he headed towards the Hokage's office.

"Hey Shikamaru! Wait up will ya!" he yelled loud enough to scare the shit out of a little old lady packing her fruit stall.

The shadow user halted mid step and slowly turned his head to glare at his friend. Upon noticing his narrowed glare, the blonde, who is not one to beat around the bush, confronted him when he reached his side.

"What crawled up your ass and died?"

"Fuck you Naruto. FUCK. YOU. In the ass, with no fucking lube!" the usually calm and level headed man yelled back. To angry to give a shit about cussing out the Hokage in the middle of a crowded street.

"HEY! WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?"

"What's my problem? What's MY problem?" he shouted the second question more louder than the first for dramatic effect. " oh I don't know, maybe it's the fact that I haven't been laid in a fucking week!" he says through clenched teeth, not wanting poor old ladies knowing about his personal life.