Past To Be Erased

Felix (1)

Run.

I swear, this word is absurd.

I always thought that it means nothing more than just the physical activity that I love. It was my way of letting it all out. Stress, anger, sometimes pain. It was the only thing that could fix me again and give me the strenght to continue.

But the real meaning of this word, the one that my frustrated life thaught me, is so much different. Yeah, it's basically same word, but deep down, it's not, at all. The second meaning doesn't give me peace. I hate it more than anything. It's the one which causes anger, pain and stress that first meaning destroys. It's the absurd of this word. Something you worship and hate at the same time. It gives you strenght, but it also takes it away. Heal you and destroys you.

The second meaning of running is runaway.

I frowned looking at the sky. I didn't even run for 30 minutes, and the rain is about to start. That's why I hate autumn. At this time of the year I feel the most shitty. Which is absolutely normal, since I can't do the only thing that calms me. Even those grey colors of clouds, which I really like, couldn't make me enjoy. I hate sun, it's too much bright, but I hate rain even more.

I felt water drop on my face and cursed silently. Guess it's time to go home.

--------------------------

I got completely wet.

Even though I ran pretty fast, my house is like 30 minutes away. I somehow managed to arrive in 15 minutes, which is my new record. But I was still as wet as drowned rat.

''Yo Felix! Is that you?'' I heard a harsh voice of my best friend. It looks like he just woke up.

''No, it's your mother...'' I yelled back as I closed door. I started taking of my shoes and wet clothes.

''Not cool man'', he says and I can almost see him rolling his eyes, ''I just thought that, at least today, I'd wake up before you. But that's impossible. Honestly I... What the fuck happened to you?!''

''Isn't it obvious?'' now was my turn to roll my eyes. I pushed past him and started going upstairs to my room and bathroom.

Axel has been my best friend since I know him. We used to hang out all the time and now he's my roommate. I remember when all this shit happened in my life and I told him that I'm moving to Los Angeles. He insisted to go with me and no matter how many times I refused and tried to tell him to stay, he didn't even want to hear about it. So here we are now in two-floored house that used to belong to my grandparents. It's very modern house, considered that my family is pretty rich. At least the part of family I'm in contact with, which would only be my grandparents. Axel and I visited them as soon as we arrived here. They were kind enough to give us the second house, the one we're living in now. Since Axel's parents are in fond of me, they didn't bother him for moving to another city with me. Besides, they know how much I wanted to leave San Diego.

''You know what? Just hurry up or we're going to be late for school...AGAIN!'' he shouted from downstaires.

He was absolutely right about that. It was only half of month since the beginning of school year, and we were late every morning. So we didn't left the best impression on the professors since they considered the oldest students to be the most devoted and in that a way to encourage young students to be better. What a nonsense! I mean, really? Senior student should be more interested in school?

I'm definitely a strong student, if we're looking at my grades, but nobody can force me to follow god damn rules. In my opinion, rules are there just so they can limit human freedom. Who says that I can't listen to music in the middle of the class, if I already know the fucking lesson? That's disrespecting towards professor? Really? That same professor would run over us students with car if he could.